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Candiru are scary, scary creatures. It's not without reason that they're called vampire fish. The thought of a fish swimming up my urethra and beginning to EAT MY INSIDES makes me cringe.
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*looks down and shivers*
Cecil Adams of the Straight Dope reported on the surgical removal of a candiru from a man that survived an attack by the fish. The deceased fish was measured to be 134mm (5 1/2 inches) in length. The fish entered the victim's urethra while he urinated, "with his penis out of the water yet close to it." - Wikipedia....
Jam it back in, in the dark.