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Welcome to the Exploding Garrmondo Weiner Interactive Swiss Army Penis. |
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![]() Honorable Mention - Mortal Kombat X While not as good as it's predecessor (not as much nostalgia going for it, which is what probably helped 9), it's still a pretty solid game. The crypt though is freakin scary and you have to go through it if you want to unlock some stuff. Glad to see this series is still going strong after the debacle of Armageddon and vs. DC Universe. ![]() Dragon Ball Xenoverse - 5 Create your own character in the Dragon Ball Universe and fight alongside Goku and friends as you play through the Dragon Ball Z timeline to save history as some evil time travellers are trying to screw everything up. Good looking game, fun at times, but GRINDING IS A PAIN. This also has online, but I never really tried it. ![]() Super Mario Maker - 10 Create your own Mario levels or play someone else's. Neat idea and very fun. You can play a variety of different ones ranging from the styles of Super Mario Bros., Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Mario World, and New Super Mario Bros. U. The problem is it's greatest strength is also it's greatest flaw: there appears to be an oversaturation of levels available to play. Even if you try to filter it to only 5 star levels you'll be lucky to find a level that isn't a do nothing musical or an impossible level. Still though, for the 30th anniversary of Mario this is a real treat. ![]() Batman Arkham Knight - 10 Despite the problems it has had on the PC release, this was a great game to close the Arkham series. All of the gameplay from the previous Arkham games is present, including the flawless combat from City and the crime scene re-creation from Arkham Origins. You also have the Batmobile too, which helps you get around Gotham quickly most of the time. Unfortunately it's used WAY too much in this game (I'd say about 40% of the time). You get to see the return of several characters from the Batman universe, but also some new ones. There's one which just...really creeps me the **** out. ![]() Splatoon - 15 I've barely played the single player in this game. Most of my gameplay has come from the fun multiplayer. While this is probably considered a third-person shooter, the goal here isn't to kill the other team (although it helps). The goal is to cover as much of the map with your team's ink color as opposed to the other team's (marking your territory I guess). My favorite part though is the Splatfest. It's kind of like Nintendo took the Everybody Votes Channel concept from the Wii and turned it into a 24 hour civil war in Splatoon. You cast your votes by not only choosing a side, but also how often the side wins a battle against the other side. The usual bright and sunny atmosphere in the lobby is changed into a night star filled party with fireworks, lots of drawings from the players, and the Squid Sisters dancing and singing to a really catchy tune. ![]() Huniepop - 30 I feel no shame in playing this. As of this post it is currently my 7th most played game on Steam logging in at 62 hours. This puzzle/dating-sim is very addictive. Your job is to find and date every girl in town to the point where they want to have sex with you. Yes, you heard me. You get to have sexy times in this game. How well you do on your dates depends on a puzzle game. You just move a piece as horizontally or vertically from it's spot in order to match 3 or more of the same piece. There's some strategy involved too as the pieces resemble a trait that a girl may either favors most or least. You'll also ask them questions and get to know them a little better. Sometimes they'll quiz you back to make sure you were paying attention. Every time you complete a date, they'll send you a text on your phone of a picture of them. Each picture you receive might get a little more, shall we say, revealing. Oh and it gets a little better. Even though it's pretty revealing enough on Steam, there's actually an uncensored patch you can apply to make things a little more messy. I love the music in this game as well and listen to it at work at least once or twice a week. It's very calming. So yeah, a total package that was originally my first pick for Game of the Year. ![]() Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain - 30 A HIDEO KOJIMA GAME. #FUCKONAMI I could leave it at that and it'd be enough, but there's more. I have 113 hours logged for this game on Steam making it my 3rd most played game behind Counter-Strike: Source and Team Fortress 2. Metal Gear Solid 5 is a bit of a departure compared to the predecessors you may have played. For one, no more life bar or rations. Your life now depends on how many hits you've taken, which can vary depending on if it's a bullet, an explosion, or just getting hit by a vehicle. The screen will turn more of a red depending on how close you are to death. If you find some cover and rest, the screen will slowly turn back to normal. The game is more open world than ever, you're no longer infiltrating just one large base but rather several outposts in the area which may include just a tower and a camp or an entire village. Rarely will you infiltrate an area that's more like a fortress. Since this game takes place in 1984, you can gather several casette tapes to music that played around that time such as Europe's Final Countdown and A-Ha's Take On Me. These can be listened to while you're traversing from outpost to outpost. For the most part it still plays like Metal Gear and the story is no different. Kojima really did a nice job in tying everything up in the MGS Saga, while making sure to f*** with your head with the biggest mindf*** in Metal Gear history. There was one boss fight where I was in freakin fear and spent a good 45 minutes trying to beat these guys...and I still failed. The last time I had that long of an endurance fight was Psycho Mantis back on MGS1 where I didn't know the memory card trick. Not game related, but you may be wondering about the hashtag. This was Kojima's last game with Konami before they released him and the way they've treated him in this departure...this may as well be the last Metal Gear game. Jam it back in, in the dark. |
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