The Downside of Sex

Originally Posted by Sassafrass

I'm offended, honestly, by the need to "give praise" to every person who does good. You should WANT to do good, and you should do it without expectation of fucking PRAISE. We're not dogs, people. We don't need a treat or a good word said after every good thing we do.

I disagree. We are, to a LARGE extent, creatures of positive reinforcement. For example, ask any psychologist the most successful way for overcoming unwanted behaviors -- positive reinforcement for a WANTED behavior. It's not our lack of willpower or desire to "Do good," it's the way our brains our wired.

As far as sexual relationships, I think I should let it known that I'm pretty conservative. I was a football player through grade school. I went to "Jock Parties," I dated cheerleaders. I'm not a virgin. I know what it's all about. I'm not going to say that all "casual sex," is bad. However, in my experience, most sexual encounters give people baggage they have to carry to the next relationship. This is especially true of the girls I've known, but also guys. I know a married couple, where the husband can't hold the wife a certain way because it reminds her of a drunken orgy she was involved in. It's an extreme example, but one that I hope my marriage doesn't resemble.

My current girlfriend is a virgin. I've never known a girl like her, she is so special. I'm determined to keep her pure until we marry, or she marries someone else.

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PB and Spanglish, I think you're making a wise decision, and I've said the same thing to guys as well (not just girls). The reasons for having sex outside of marriage are superficial and transient compared to the damage that it can cause. When I was having sex as a youngin', even when I wanted to "please" whoever I was with, it was a selfish act that I wish I had had the self-control to refrain from.

There's nowhere I can't reach.