[Tournament] Winter Olympics - Vancouver 2010 - WHOSE GAME IS IT, BITCHES (Shin has no teeth)

Because if you can ski jump seventy meters, that's good.

If you can ski jump seventy meters while flashing goat horns, you're just that much more awesome.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I dunno. Do they still award medals to a corpse that somehow manages to finish in good time? Is there anything in the rule book that requires an athlete to be alive when they pass the finish line?

I think we've hit a very exploitable loophole here. I say, in 2014, that the American luge team should consist of hollowed out corpses, and one living player to mount them on the luge. Hell, they won't even need protective gear adding weight and slowing them down. Maybe we could just strap a fetus to the luge and give it a good, swift kick.

I would pay good money to see the Americans hoist a dead baby with a gold medal around its neck as they carry it around the course in celebration. Fuck you, Russia. You got beat by an abortion. How does that feel?

There's nowhere I can't reach.

So if some dude was struck by a train and had nearly every bone in his body broken, then spent the next five years relearning how to do fucking everything - the simplest task like eating breakfast becoming a grueling trial of pain and frustration every single day - but stuck with it and worked every day to become stronger until, in a triumphant display of willpower and determination, he completed a marathon...

...you couldn't be proud of someone like that because fuck all what's he got to do with anything in your life?

Man, you are fucking cold. No wonder God put you in Canada. You're refrigerating the place!

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Originally Posted by Da Syphillis ELIMINATOR

Let's define the word "proud".

from the dictionary:
feeling self-respect or pleasure in something by which you measure your self-worth

It's quite acceptable to take pride in your self-worth for being human enough to respect another person whose accomplishments cause you to feel better about the world in general.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?