Dealing With Depression

The only cure for depression is to not be depressed. Accept your position in life and stop moping. We all get anxious, we all have concerns over the unknown. That's normal, there's nothing wrong with you. Don't act like there is.

If you don't like your current status, change it. If you acknowledge that your current status is an investment for the future, then accept what you've chosen with the satisfaction of knowing that you'll be better off for it. If you don't truly believe you'll be better off, then why are you sticking around?

Forget drugs like Zoloft and Wellbutrin. They don't fix a damned thing, they just mask the symptoms. Wellbutrin doesn't mend relationships. Zoloft doesn't find you a better job. Don't rely upon drugs to do what you should've been doing yourself all this time.

I speak from experience. I've been depressed twice in my life, felt as though I'd lost all control and that I had no direction. Each struggle was short-lived because I made myself get up and deal with it. Sometimes it requires a lot of patience. Sometimes it requires fighting the odds. It can be done. I've done it.

If you don't believe you can do it, it'll never get done. Moping solves very little.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Crunchy

There's a difference between feeling shitty because you don't have a job, and clinical depression, which is what he said he has.

The only thing that makes depression clinical is that someone got paid to say "Yup, you're depressed." Otherwise, it's all the same sense of dejection and hopelessness. The duration is the only mitigating factor.

My mother suffered from depression. My brother has it now. They both took/take medication for it and I don't see much benefit. All either of them gained was a convenient crutch, a medical excuse for their misery. "Oh, I can't go look for a job. I'm depressed." The medicine hasn't made them more ambitious, it hasn't bestowed upon them better habits.

Depression is a lack of belief in oneself and in others. Therapy can help recover this but you have to be willing to accept change. And let's face it, you may not be willing to change. Deep down, this strife, this drama - it's what you want. It gets you attention, you crave that attention. I've seen your type - you lack confidence. You don't believe yourself to be remarkable in any way, so being a perpetual victim of your own creation is the only way you can be noticed by others. People are sympathetic, they pat you on the shoulders and tell you you're special, that you're a swell guy and all you need to do is buck up - things will get better. It's a placebo and it doesn't produce any lasting satisfaction, so you allow things to get worse so you can get more attention.

Well, guess what? It won't get better until you decide to let it. You can pay it all the lip service you like until you're blue. If you don't mean it, nothing will happen. Don't talk about the change, become the force of that change. Stop being a victim and do something about your predicament. This is how depression spirals out of control: people grow to depend upon others for confidence instead of finding it within. I've done this too - I'm not just preaching. It's harmful and medication cannot negate destructive patterns.

One month ago, I was severely ill and near penniless in the hospital. I wasn't hungry. I had no desire to get out of bed. I didn't see a point. I wasn't interested in television or my Gameboy. A few people called me but I ignored them. I didn't even want to speak to anyone. That's the lowest I've ever been in my life and it was less than thirty days ago.

I laid there in a hospital bed wondering if there was any point in even trying to recover my health. I'd only go back to the same house, the same job and the same debts. I could've let myself die right there if I wanted to. The doctors agreed: I was clinically depressed.

They wanted to medicate me. They tried. I refused the pills. I had to force myself to get up and to take everything piece by piece. I had to find a reason to continue because I sure as hell didn't come all that way just to give up in a hospital bed. I didn't know what I was looking for, just that the search itself was enough reason to forge on ahead.

Over the next few weeks, things improved. After months of frustration, my financial burden was significantly lightened. I received some unexpected correspondence from a place I'd contacted a long while ago, and they offered me a very appealing prospect for my future. A couple folk I know took a lot of time from their busy schedule to come visit me and make sure I had things I needed - friends I never fully realized I had. My physical recovery was faster than expected and in six weeks, I'll be taking a very huge step forward in that department once again. I'm nervous but I'm also excited.

A month ago, I could've died. Instead, I stopped feeling sorry for myself and decided to find a better direction. In that moment, everything around me changed too. Right now, I'm very optimistic for my future. I've got real plans for my health, my education, my career and my hobbies. In the process, I might find plans for romance. Who knows?

Depression is nothing but a matter of perspective. You're a victim or you're in control. Shit or get off the pot.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Wanzer's right. You're gonna have to do better than buying your way out of depression.

I'll concede that it's not always simple to find a charitable outlet. Many places are no longer willing to accept walk-in assistance. You can thank the miracle of frivolous lawsuits for that. But this isn't to say that outlets cannot be found.

Although I myself am not very religious, church outreach programs can still be very rewarding.
Volunteering at children's hospitals is also a very worthwhile exercise. Some kids are there for weeks at a time and their parents have to work. Many children appreciate someone who'll play Monopoly or air hockey with them.
If you're unable to find a specific outlet, contact a local service organization such as Kiwanis, Lions Club, The Rotarians or the Sunrise Optimists. Any of these clubs will know of several places or efforts that need more manpower and they'll be able to introduce you to the people necessary to begin helping out. They won't be upset or bothered by your inquiry so don't be shy, it's why these clubs exist.

Even if you're not the social type, there's stuff to do. You don't even need to be part of a group. Get a garbage bag and go to the park or a popular place, then pick up all the trash as you safely can. Who cares if anyone thanks you? You've done the community a service and you know what you did. That's all that really matters. But if you keep at it, maybe others will notice. Some may even be inspired to join in. You never know what could come of something so simple and selfless.

It's all in what you put into the effort that determines what you gain from it. Donations are a fine thing but sometimes you need to immerse yourself completely, if for no other reason than to break up the monotony.

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