You are a Darwin Award candidate

Well lets see...

When I was a baby I crawled off a 13 foot ledge, landed on my back, and had one solid bruise from my shoulders down to my ass. My mother said I pissed blood for a few days.

Also when I was a baby I ate an entire can of chew... another visit to the hospital.

Did I mention that I almost died from CIDs?

When I was 7 or 8 I built mini demolition charges out of gunpowder, a fuse, and a spent .22 short cartridge. We were playing with our Tonka trucks and I thought it would be cool to blow up the rocks in our way just like the real people did. someone told on me before I could use them, probably a good thing.

When I was 9 there was a huge storm, it knocked down a lot of trees into the slue near where I lived. Well about a mile down the road at a friends home many of those trees had collected in the slue out behind his house, well we'd go out running on them for fun. When I told my mom she about shit her pants. Most of them would move (a lot) when you'd step on them so I was probably lucky that I didn't fall in between them and die.

In elementary school (2nd and 3rd grade) a few friends and I would do back flips out of the swings, we came up with some rather inventive techniques to do "stunts" from the swings, including what we called the superman which involved switching from a seated position to your stomach, to my favorite the back flip, and even to a rotating back flip where you not only flipped upside down but also turned completely around as well, though I was the only one who did the last one.

I've also done some other stuff that shouldn't be repeated... all of it funny at the time, but rather dumb in hindsight.

Jam it back in, in the dark.