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Gruesome is too hard to do. I think i'd just eat some deadly plant or seed or something and die in the woods and have the rabbits bury me.
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Most poisons are a terrible way to die...
Oddly enough the only time I have ever really thought about killing myself it was by ramming a sword through my heart, a fleeting thought I assure you. Though if I were actually intent on killing myself I would tell all my friends and family I got the job of a lifetime in XX state and that I was moving away, then go out into the woods with a lot of explosives (10lbs or more and possibly mixed with thermite) then dig a hole, a deep one, climb down into the hole and set the explosives off. The bomb means instant death and the hole should be deep enough that when the dirt settles back down to the earth my body should be covered. Because it would take a long time (probably weeks) to dig an appropriately deep hole it would give me plenty of time to actually stop and think about whether or not I really want to die.
Jam it back in, in the dark.
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Gumby