I'll try to kinda answer your questions from a German POV, just because I feel like it right now. It could very well be that it's a lot different in America, but I'm sure someone else will step in if that's the case.
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1. Brokers fees. Who pays them? My dad has always been under the impression that the person who sells the property pays the broker, but from what I'm seeing, the people who rent the place pay the brokers fees. Is this true everywhere or just NYC?
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AFAIK the broker fee is always two monthly rents. Lessor and lessees pay half of it (so you have to pay 1/5 of the total monthly rent, unless everyone of you pays a different price for their individual room - which should be the case when there are several differently sized rooms).
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2. What sort of things should we have ready for when we do sign the lease?
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Pen, common sense, second person to read it.
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3. Will all 5 of us need to be present when we sign the lease?
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Not really, I guess. Here in Germany, all lessees are present during the inspection of the apartment and they write down their adresses for the lessor who then sends them their individual contract. After you carefully read and signed it afterwards, you send it back to him. So, yes, unless one of you takes the responsibility for the apartment and you just pay him (such a person is generally referred to as "loser"), all of you will have to sign their individual contracts.
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4. For any of you living in and around NYC, would you suggest New Jersey as an option?
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Sorry, can't help here.
You see, I cannot really help you 100% accurately, but I just felt like posting. Someone else should be able to assure if it's the same process in America.
Jam it back in, in the dark.