How much shit do you put on your body?

Just the standard deodorant and occasionally aftershave when I shave. A little bit of cologne if I'm going out. If my hair is the right length, I might even throw some gel in it. Other than that, I hate chap stick and lip balm. Makes my face all greasy. The only time I use it is if I have extremely dry lips. In those situations, greasy lips are better than dry and cracked lips. I don't even get my face painted. I hate having creams and paints on my face. Anywhere else is fine =P

edit: and as for washing my hair, I just use this generic pert plus brand 2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner. Its the only thing I've found that keeps the natural grease out of my hair. It's an embarrassing fact of life, but the proper shampoo keeps it under control.

Jam it back in, in the dark.