Chatting up complete strangers

Like Monkey King, I find starting conversations with strangers is absolutely rude and intrusive. Especially if I were to carry on.

I will interact briefly, maybe complimenting a woman's bag or shoes or something. But I make an effort to not speak to strangers about nothing.

It annoys me when people use up my time when I am clearly trying to do something or even on a train or something. I am usually not interested in engaging in conversation with strangers unless they have something pertinent to say.

This could be because all the strangers that have always talked to me annoyed the hell out of me by being completely unable to shut up.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Exactly, it bothers me all the time. One man kept trying to talk to me even though he could clearly tell I was uncomfortable, though this was when I was a freshman in high school.

I've been interrupted reading the paper, a book, playing a game and so on.

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This could be because all the strangers that have always talked to me annoyed the hell out of me by being completely unable to shut up.

I think this is it for me. I have not enjoyed one single out of the blue conversation, the people are either rude or don't know when to end the conversation. Maybe if I enjoyed just one of them, I wouldn't be so pissy about it.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Personally, I like talking to strangers. It makes me feel good to know that something I might say in a random conversation could be just what that person needed to hear that day.I don't mind talking to random people. Alot of time its just lonely old ladies. I like talking to them because they are pretty wise most times. And they actually can hold their end of the conversation. Its never just idle "oh the weathers nice today". Sometimes I hear these really long winded stories. It really makes the wait for the bus seem more interesting. Sometimes when I'm on the bus, bussing through downtown, some drunk person will sit beside me, and start telling me his tale of woe. And I generally just sit and listen, because sometimes thats what the person needs. Plus, it can be pretty funny stories sometimes too. I always attract conversations it seems. Theres hardly a busride where I don't have someone chatting it up with me. Its really cool in my opinion. Anyhow, thats my two cents.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by Monkey King

This is a lot different from something like talking to other people in a club, where it's assumed you all share a common interest.

This is exactly how people talk to strangers. Hang out in a place where others have the same interest it's alot easier that way. For the most part I am with you on the intrusive idea.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Setting is a huge thing. But there are many times I find myself talking to strangers outside of clubs and gatherings. Just random blotches of the world.

A huge problem for me is topic selection. I usually talk about two things at once so it's incredibly confusing for someone that doesn't know me or the way I conduct things.

Intrusiveness is hard to expect sometimes when someone is just looking bored, they might even be tired. It just seems hard to tell sometimes about a reaction... So it's pretty much a leap. I think this is another of the fears of unknown kinda thing I've been prone to fall victim to.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I was on a train recently and I found myself conversing with a Dairy Farmer from deep into the Irish countryside. It was obvious that the man hadn't been out of his local area in a few years, let alone on a train. Once I discovered he had no comprehension of what my video iPod was, I was full sure what I was dealing with: a man without a Television, rare enough even in rural Ireland. Nevertheless it was intresting to be able to fascinate the man with the concept of 300 "Records" on my iPod or the ability to take a photograph of my sleeping friend next to me with my phone. After engaging him in a discussion about the Strategic Defence Inititive and Reganomics of the '80's, he had to disembark at his destination. My friend then "woke up" and asked "How do you do it?" Talk to a stranger about nothing for 2 hours. To be honest until right then, I didn't notice I did. And it was only then I discovered he NEVER does. I guess I think it depends on the person. Peoples mood to a certain extent and their own desire for company vs solitude as well.

FELIPE NO

How do you guys pick the right stranger to talk to? Or is it some sub-conscious Oh-this-guy/girl-seems-friendly-lets-talk-to-him/her sense?

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by Menzoberranzan

How do you guys pick the right stranger to talk to? Or is it some sub-conscious Oh-this-guy/girl-seems-friendly-lets-talk-to-him/her sense?

Pretty much.

After talking to strangers for a while, you kind of get used to how to conduct a conversation with people.

I'm absolutely weird/strange, everyone knows this, but I'm also humorous, so most of the times, my random conversations can go anywhere at any given moment.

I've ALWAYS met random people. At the Doctor's office, I met this dude who was into WoW. We went ot the Burger King next door (we had to wait hours to get in) and ate and cracked jokes.

I actually don't find it odd that a lot of the more prominent posters find it odd/disturbing/intruding. Why else would you be sitting on a computer all day if you had social skills?

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Reznor

I actually don't find it odd that a lot of the more prominent posters find it odd/disturbing/intruding. Why else would you be sitting on a computer all day if you had social skills?

...So do you have any useful advice you'd like to pass along? Or did you just wander in here to gloat?

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I actually strike up conversation with people while waiting for the bus quit often, after a while its hard to count them as strangers. How this particular conversation starts are always the same:

Me: Which bus are you waiting for?

Them: This or that bus.

Me: Its it late again?

Them: yeah... I think so.

Me: Man.. that's stupid.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I actually started a horrible romantic relationship with a somewhat random stranger on the street. She went to my school and we where waiting for the bus at the same stop, basically the only two things we had in common. I said, "Hey, I'd ask you out but I don't know you," and went uphill for a little while, then came crashing down soon after.

I guess with random people it really is pretty fucking random!

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by Monkey King

...So do you have any useful advice you'd like to pass along? Or did you just wander in here to gloat?

I think I gave advice, IE: Chat up random strangers, make more friends.

I wasn't gloating in the least. I said I find it odd.

But whatever, take offense because you're a social retard.

I was speaking idiomatically.

a quick snippet of "hey your shirt is cool" or "nice shoes" is well, i guess acceptable and even nice. you aren't gonna get to knowing any interesting people if you don't put yourself out there and talk to them.

plus its my job to do such a thing as starting conversation with random complete strangers D= (at my job). so by now i'm used to it.
its like 'hey you lets talk about the weather so you'll buy more stuff?'

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by Reznor

I think I gave advice, IE: Chat up random strangers, make more friends.

I wasn't gloating in the least. I said I find it odd.

But whatever, take offense because you're a social retard.

"Chat up random strangers, make more friends" is the biggest piece of condescending non-advice you could give, actually. But what would I know; I'm just a social retard, here to be obviously inferior to you so you'll feel better about yourself, right?

FELIPE NO

Sadly, I'm not very good at conversation. I get very shy and don't know what to say. I do try to talk to people if they start to conversate with me, but it just feels so awkward, and I am sure the person thinks I'm a complete retard. To the point, though, I don't think it's a bad thing to chat on the grocery line or at your kid's gym class or something like that. It's kinda nice to connect.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

i feel its ok if the stranger just says a few things and give you a choice wether to talk back to them and strike up a good conversation but i do feel its rude when a person keeps talkin to you even after you kinda ignore them to show you don't want to talk to them :P if i don't feel like talking to a person i normally just smile, nod to whatever they said and look another way pretending to do something else ^_^;;

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Other than a "good morning" or a "hello," I don't talk to strangers unless I have something to talk to them about. Like today I went to the store and a few people (two broads, one dude) were in there drinking. As I waited for my change I heard them mention my tattoos so I turned around and gave them a better view and we talked for a few minutes. That was that. There's absolutely nothing wrong with speaking to strangers if you have a point. If you're just being random then you come off as a weird fuck.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I'm not big on chatting with strangers. I'm not a big fan of small-talk in general at all. Whether it be friends or strangers. You don't really just jump into a long, engaging conversation with a stranger you just met, so it is usually small-talk. I don't like to initiate them, but if a stranger starts a conversation with me, I won't be rude and neglect them.

It has happened to me before plenty of times. Usually about sports. Like say I'm out somewhere with an Eagles jersey on, someone might start up an Eagles conversation. "How about McNabb tearing his ACL?" Something like that.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.