Your loved one falls into a coma. Do you start dating again?

I think I would wait. I'd rather not risk the gamble, so to speak, that'd be involved in dating others and possibly even remarrying. And I wager that anybody that I potentially would care for to the point of dating and even remarrying to is not the type of person that would be comfortable at the idea of me leaving a comatose spouse behind. And since it's a marriage that's involved, it wouldn't be a matter only between me, my spouse in the coma, and this other girl either. Familial flak would surely come from somewhere, and that just doesn't seem worth the trouble to me.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Well, if they did die, I'd probably do what WolfDemon said and eventually move on. But otherwise, yes, I would wait. Now if they woke up and couldn't remember a thing about me or something, well....I honestly don't know. I would take care of her, of course. But as for 'moving on' in such a situation, in my mind that's not an easy decision to make. In thinking about it briefly, I probably would still stay with her. However, such a tough decision warrants much consideration, a lot more than what I've given now. I'd rather wait until I come to that bridge (if I do at all) before figuring out just how to cross it, so to speak.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Originally Posted by a_lurker

It's simple really. You two made a vow that you would be there for each other. Well, now she's not holding up her end of the bargain. She can't comfort you when you're down or cook your favourite dinner whe you're sick when she's in a damn coma, can she? And those fuckers are expensive, and it's not like she's bringing any money in the relationship anymore. She broke her end of the deal first, is all I'm saying.

...What?

Yeah, maybe if she woke up one day and said, "I think I'm going to disregard my marriage obligations by falling into a coma."

EDIT:
You make it sound like the fact that she's "not holding up her end of the bargain" is her fault. Technically she's not, but chances are it wasn't her choice to do that, now was it?

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by PUG1911

You do not know that. It's impossible for us to imagine how we'd react to such circumstances. It's very romantic and all to tell ourselves that we'd wait 5 *years* or more, and wouldn't get depressed to the point of suicide, but it's just fooling ourselves into thinking we'd be the 'best' example. It's easy to think one's self as a hero before you are faced with the situation, and a prolonged situation is even more difficult to guess.

Well you do not know PiccoloNamek personally, do you? I don't either, but I wager he knows himself better than I know him and thus I am comparatively inadequate to come up with a valid answer as to what he would do, given this situation. I could make a guess based on his answers thus far, but again, he could probably give a better answer for himself than I could for him.

I think what we've all said now would have some factor in such a decision later on, were it to happen. But if it has no influence, if it's just all so ambiguous, so "impossible for us to imagine how we'd react" in the end, then I guess this discussion is pointless, and this thread is over.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Blah..you can't even connect to GFF for a few days and look what happens. :doh:

Originally Posted by a_lurker

And that's all that matters. Who cares what her motivations are? As Miss Manners says, actions speak louder than words.

I would care what her motivations were, if she were my spouse. Whether or not this coma was a direct result of her actions certainly would have an influence on my decision on this matter. I think it's ridiculous to end a marriage due to circumstances that resulted from factors beyond my control and/or hers.

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She just isn't trying hard enough to get better, that's all.

...What?

If recovery was that simple, there would be no need for doctors or nurses, or medicine as a whole for that matter. By that logic, my grandfather must've not tried hard enough to get rid of that stomach cancer, or any of my ancestors to finally get over old age, or Scarlet Fever or Smallpox.

And where did this idea that the woman put herself in the coma come from? I even went through the thread looking for that and all I've seen is that DragoonKain said "for whatever reason", not "she hates your guts and tried to kill herself but ended up in a coma instead." What if she still loved you? What if she was so sorry that things were like this, even if it was through no fault of her own? What if she so wishes she could wake up but her body is incapable of doing so alone?

Originally Posted by PUG1911

What is silly is people claiming that they know how they'll react under difficult circumstances. Especially at this relatively young stage of their lives. That's not to say that discussing one's current views on what they may do, and what they hope they would do is pointless. Just that making any kind of concrete prediction is just a guess.

Well I already said that I honestly don't know what I'd do. My first answer was based on the notion that this coma resulted from circumstances she had little or no control over. But there are many different possibilities as to how this situation could have come about, and thus I don't see only one answer to the whole thing. "For whatever reason", in my mind, makes this a rather ambiguous question. I don't think "she deliberately put herself in a coma somehow" would generate the same answer as, say, "a drunk driver suddenly swerved into her lane, causing a head-on collision and injuries to her that resulted in a coma". Not from me, anyway.

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Unless of course you want to argue that one's self perception is ever so accurate.

No, I'm just saying that any decent person honest with themselves would probably have a better perception of themselves and how they would react than anybody else. Except their parents or very close friends, maybe.

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Also, what bearing does the coma victim having made a choice in the matter have on the situation?

I think I already answered that above, for myself at least.

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How does *your* vow have anything to do with their vow? Do *you* love only because your lover loves you back? Or is your love independant of their feelings?

Both. I'd love her for the kind of person she is, but if she didn't love me back to begin with, I probably never would have made such a vow, and she probably would not have either if the same wasn't true for her regarding me. But I think it's ludicrous to say that she's not honoring her vow just because she's incapacitated, when she would be honoring her vow if the circumstances were otherwise. The only way she wouldn't be honoring her vow in my mind is if she wasn't even before she fell into a coma.

Even if that was the case, I tell you again that I'm unsure of what I would do. I base that on my perception of myself now, as well as the fact that there are numerous, perhaps endless, ways in which this situation could have come about. All I can really say for certain is that the decision would not be made without much consideration, and that uncertainty would not warrant the notion of dropping her like a bad habit.

I was speaking idiomatically.