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Confusing girl issue
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bluesy violin
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Old Sep 3, 2009, 10:32 PM Local time: Sep 4, 2009, 03:32 AM #1 of 17
When you want to set a date with a girl, be certain on the timing. You may think it's better to say "Is Thursday or Friday Okay?" But that shows you're not confident.

Once you think you've hit the point in the conversation to ask her out, try "Hey lets talk over coffee this Saturday. I know great place"

If she is busy on that day, but is interested in getting to know you better, she would suggest another day.
If she says I'll let you know on Friday, then forget it. Because its not being fair to you. She is holding you by a string.

I noticed you asked her what she wants to do. Although it is polite, in a way, it takes away the mystery. I'm sure most people would expect first dates to be something casual, so just roughly give them some idea, but keep up the mystery. If you ask her what you want to do, you will seem not confident, which could be unattractive.

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Anyway I get home, and I call her around the time I told her I would. She doesn't pick up. I leave her a message. Few minutes later, I send her a Facebook message asking her if I got the phone number right, since she verbally gave it to me over noise. She messaged me back saying it was right, but her phone was downstairs charging. I tell her to call me back when she's ready or something. About 10-20 minutes later, I realize I have her AIM too and I've talked to her on AIM before. After debating with my friends if I should IM her or not, I did.
Try not to do this. You look unsure of yourself. Also once the first date is set, try not to communicate over IM/email/text. It will ruin the experience.

Also, her friend adding you, it could be that her friend is interested in you. Which may not be a bad thing. Just keep it cool, don't sound desperate, not pushy, yet confident. You seem like a great guy, and there are really, many beautiful women out there!

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bluesy violin
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Old Sep 4, 2009, 01:31 PM Local time: Sep 4, 2009, 06:31 PM #2 of 17
Of course don't be rude. Tone of your voice when you ask her out is key.

Yes I agree with you timber, one shouldn't focus everything to the detail, although you might want a rough plan. And don't playing the guessing game too much. Chances are your intuition is usually correct on picking up her body language/voice/pitch, whether she is getting more warmer or not to you.

A good way to overcome nervousness is this:
DON'T let your date be the first girl you talk to that day.
Keep prepping yourself. It could even be that shopkeeper, salesgirl, cleaner, just talk to them over whatever mindless banter(keep it clean)

There's nowhere I can't reach.
bluesy violin
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Old Sep 21, 2009, 08:26 AM Local time: Sep 21, 2009, 01:26 PM #3 of 17
Then I see we're after different sorts of girls.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.
bluesy violin
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Old Sep 21, 2009, 09:36 AM Local time: Sep 21, 2009, 02:36 PM #4 of 17
Dirty jokes may help psyche you up but during your warm ups with the cashier or supermarket free finger food sampler girl, I believe most people wouldn't put too much attraction factor, i.e dirty jokes etc, into them, unless you're after that cashier or waitress. wtf you're just psyching yourself up, not trying to nail every supermarket attendant you see.

What I meant was you must warm up and get into the talking mode(if you have trouble starting the day), before hitting on the girl you want.

When you talk to the girl you are attracted to, you must use humor, sarcasm and witty talk BUT I'd steer off dirty jokes on a first date and racism/stereotype jokes until you fully establish her perspective on things like that... Some girls don't like it and may get angry. Well if she doesn't, its your pick if you want to dump her for being so shallow or love her 10000% because you find her attractive and have the niceness sweet wife factor.

I had this attractive girl once, she was from a broken home. Parents divorced, she has a fucked up mind cuz of that. Apparently her mom blames her all day and vents her anger on her. Thats one insanely angry girl. She totally missed all my sarcasm and humor(which works on most girls) and flared up easily. Needless to say I stopped contacting her.

Example?
Me :I won't talk to you anymore if you don't like the xmas present i bought you.
Girl :But you can't resist me (still looking good)
Me :Oh yes I can. Unless you smile. But you never smile. So I think I'm quite safe from you
Girl : wtf it happens.
Me : (just kidding ... little miss grumpy...)

Gechmir : Ah yes I've never dated an anime girl before. Would be nice if I could find one

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Last edited by bluesy violin; Sep 21, 2009 at 09:37 AM. Reason: i am a hippie
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