[Multiplatform] Worst video games in history

* Okay so this is a thread where people can share their worst memories when it comes to video games.

Requirements:
1. Name + platform
2. Screenshot(s) (for large screenshots, use spoiler tags please)
3. Short summary
(feel free to add stuff as long as it makes sense)

Game portfolios not meeting these requirements are going to be whamboozled! Retards are not welcome and will be banned from this thread. In general, use your brain and don't be an idiot, hope this helps.

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Turbo Toons [SNES]




Take a wild ride with more than 20 classic Hanna Barbera cartoon characters! Yogi Bear, Hong Kong Phooey, Captain Caveman, Top Cat, and many more are along for the journey. More than 30 different racecourses make up this epic challenge, taking you through all sorts of familiar cartoon settings. Of course, it's not all fun and games. You'll find that some of these 'toons have cheating hearts and mean streaks, so you'll have to be at your best if you're going to emerge victorious. The one-player modes are addicting, and multiplayer modes allow for up to five players in Head-to-Head Challenge mode. Get ready to have your funny bone tickled, because this is one hysterical trek. -ign.com

I think it takes about 20 minutes to finish the game. Without cheating, that is.

What reviewers say:
DARE DEVIL CART RACING GAME
THE GREAT ARCADE GAME IN 3D ACTION
ONE OF THE BEST GAMES AROUND
BRILLIANT GRAPHICS
FOR THE QUALITY OF MY GOODS PLEASE CHECK MY FEEDBACK (yeah okay)

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Jam it back in, in the dark.

Dragon Booster [DS]

Dragon Booster is an animated ABC Kids show about a futuristic civilization where humans and dragons coexist…and race for some reason. Regardless of how improbable it might seem, racing dragons sounds like it could be a decent premise for a video game. Apparently Konami thought so, at least, because it has published a racing game for the Nintendo DS based on the show. However, Dragon Booster the game is only a racing game in the most basic sense. There is a starting line and a finishing line, and the objective is to make it to the end of the course before your opponents do. Other than that there isn't much actual racing involved. You have no direct control over the speed of your dragon, and steering is automatic. The result is a hollow and utterly joyless rail shooter with some ancillary racing tenets tacked on, and it's one that should be avoided by even the most devout fans of the show.

-Gamespot.com

There's nothing like playing a racing game where you don't control the thing your racing in... On top of that, at the beginning of every race, you always start in 4th place. No matter WHAT, you always start in 4th place. It's your job to get in first, but when you can only move left and right, it's not much fun. Not much fun at all... Gamespot was too nice giving this piece of crap a 2.9. Not even a 2 in my book. <_<

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Wreckless: The Yakuza Missions [GC]

The poorly optimized GameCube version robs the original of most of its visual style and slows the pace considerably, resulting in a mediocre mission-based driving game with poor handling. - Gamespot
Click here for review with images.

First off, sorry for the lack of images, but they're in the linked review. That said, this game was a disaster. Besides the shitty premise, the multiplayer was impossible (one person has a good view, but since it doesn't split the screen, the other person has to follow their car which is in the distance), and the single player wasn't any fun. To add insult to injury, I bought this crap for $60 since I live overseas. Damn it was a waste - wasn't even worth $10. Gamespot was generous - I wouldn't even give this a 4/10.

Most amazing jew boots

Cookie and Cream [DS]



To put it simply, The Adventures of Cookie & Cream from Agetec is a game that deviates from the norm. While on the outside it may seem like a standard multiplayer party game, the new twists brought on by some completely original gameplay elements make this game an absolute blast to play.

- gamespot.com

Mind you, that excerpt is from the clearly superior PS2 version. Sure, this awesome sleeper hit is ported to the DS...taking out everything that made it so awesome. This time around: early, early PS1 graphics, horrendously simplified gameplay mechanics that now make teamwork optional, and hohum minigames really highlight just how bad a port can be.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Fading Footsteps (PC)




Both IGN and Gamespot didn't review this game, and for good reason!

Fading Footsteps is a 1997 simulation game, and blurbs from the CD case include 'the most realistic wolf simulation game ever' and 'graphics are so real.' It's too bad the actual game has neither of those.

The game puts you in control of a wolf pack, and you attempt to survive by sleeping, drinking, and eating by attacking large game. When you come across something delicious, you can choose from among several plays (you know, like football) to catch the critter, but no matter what you pick, the wolves don't do a damn thing.

The graphics, as you can see in the screengrabs, is absolutely hideous. The 'forest' is just a giant continuing block of 'trees.' Heck, even calling them trees is too generous. The world is very sparse and you see nothing but green blobs for miles around.

You spend more time drinking than anything else, as the meter falls far too rapidly.

The manual conveniently doesn't tell you what that black box in the lower left corner does.

If you really want to play a wolf simulation game, go get Sanctuary Woods' Wolf. It's in 2D, but it's far better than this crap.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Why is there more than one wolf simulation game in the first place.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Why isn't Bubsy 3D on here, y'mean =U

FELIPE NO

Timecop (SNES)




Based off of the Jean Claude Van Damme film Timecop, this game acts as a sequel of sorts. We learned well from the film that the power time travel affords corrupts all men weaker than the Muscles from Brussels, and this has extended to the original inventor of time travel. He proclaims himself dictator of the universe, captures Van Damme as he arrives from fixing all the wrongs in the film, and challenges him to a "duel across time." Platforming action follows across multiple periods of history.

The primary feature of this game is its digitized characters, uncommon for console games of that era. Actors were taped in front of a bluescreen and stills were taken from the video to create all characters and their animations. The effect is impressive for the SNES, though it does result in robotic enemies who do not respond well to being punched or kicked. The "timing,", both in terms of controlling your character and fighting with enemy characters seems off through the entire game.

There are 15 levels in total, most of which are standard fighting platform levels. Three basic fighting moves are available to the character, not including jumping and crouching kicks, and not including the use of a gun with extremely limited ammo. Some vehicle levels are mixed in, and the game culminates in a jetpack duel over Los Angeles with the villainous time travel creator fellow.

The game also featured some rare use of digital voice, primarily in the "FBI... Get on it!" background theme in the first few levels.

This game was pretty bad. The animation was 'motion captured' from a Jean-Claude stunt double who was undergoing knee surgery and the enemies were just one guy dressed in white who ran the entire factory and made clones of himself. Navigating the levels was best done by playing craps, of course finding the exit was worse than actually getting a jackpot.

Just stay away from this game. It's fucking terrible.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by Gechmir

Why isn't Bubsy 3D on here, y'mean =U

I think Bubsy 3D is like Superman 64 in that the game is so bad that it's actually worth playing just to check out the comical amount of bad!

My Hero (SMS)



My Hero is all about jump kicking .. bank robbers (?) in the face. Over and over and over and over! You also have the ability to punch but watch out, it hardly ever works. Just merely touching a scary bank robber results in instant death. You can even die from jump kicking them in the face. The collision detection is horrendous. They flood the screen from both sides non-stop. Sometimes one of them will chuck a bottle at you from above, or a midget bank robber will hurl knives at your kneecaps. When you reach a boss, the game moves onto the exact same level. The game goes in one huge loop, it's absolute torture. Three lives, no continues! Circus music! Have a fun, enjoy!

"It has no online mode! Nothing is even worth playing without online multiplayer, we here at IGN do not care that the Master System cannot go online, it's no excuse. Sloppy work, Sega. 10/10 - IGN.com"

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Infernal Monkey

My Hero (SMS)

Is this the guy in Fighter's Megamix, with the cool shades and the batteries? Or am I thinking some other "hero" in an old Sega game? =o

EDIT:
Oh, Rent-A-Hero. Carry on!

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Nah, that guy was from Sega's Rent-A-Hero! =D The My Hero dude doesn't deserve to be in the same game as the Dayona USA car!

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Yu Yu Hakusho: Dark Tournament (PS2)



Based on one of the most popular anime franchises in the history of U.S. syndication, Yu Yu Hakusho: Dark Tournament brings the one-on-one fighting experience home to the PlayStation 2. Retelling the famous Dark Tournament saga from the original television series, Yu Yu Hakusho enables players to select from more than 25 different characters including Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Kurama as they battle one another inside eight unique and destructible arenas. Additionally, bonus game modes such as survival and team battle are available as well as a strategic "Token Battle" board game that offers more than 150 different tactical pieces.

- ign.com

As a fan of the series, I don't know how even fans of the series can look past how terrible this game is. Not only is it unbalanced, it's unbalanced in ways that don't make sense. Kuwabara and Genkai are 2 of the best characters while Hiei and Kurama are two of the worst. Kurama moves so absurdly slow for how agile he was in the show and Hiei's dragon of the darkness flame decides it's a good idea to fly all over the screen before hitting the enemy, giving them way more time then needed to block it and take absolutely zero damage. Meanwhile Kuwabara can whip most people just by getting his sword out and spamming attacks with it and Genkai can beat almost anyone with projectiles by making them hit themself.

And the unbalance doesn't even take into account the absurd requirements to unlock the majority of the characters.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I will 2nd the terribleness of Yu Yu Hakusho: Dark Tournament. Like Ozzie said, the game is unbalanced. All you have to do is see Toguro's massive combo that takes away most of your life. No other character has that ability.

There's another problem with it, though...the controls. I can't remember the simple moves much, but I distinctly remember the frustration I encountered when trying to do combos especially when doing them in training mode in Genkai. I know I input the correct combination numerous times and Genkai kept telling me I was wrong.

I also had several problems with the story mode, but one I'd like to point out. When you fought Toguro at the end and thought you had him beat, he powers up to what looks like 30% of his strength...it sure as hell didn't look like 80 or higher. Then when you beat him, it shows a cutscene at the end but he's at his full power. Cutscene at the end was alright though, it was cool to see some new YYH animation. One more thing about the final fight...completely unfair.

Bottom line: We got screwed over with Dark Tournament. Japan on the other hand got something much better and more balanced. Import that game, and stay the hell away from this one.

I was speaking idiomatically.