Drunken excursions

So the closest I've been to drunk is either spinning around in circles for five minutes, cooking shrimp scampi with white wine, or coming out of general anesthesia after getting my wisdom teeth pulled. I've heard good stories (like funny stories, not just stupid ones) from friends who've been drunk, and I was wondering what everyone's best stories are?

I think the best non-drunk acting-drunk story I've heard was my buddy who would get together with all his non-drinking friends, they'd pick what kind of drunk they would be out of a hat (happy drunk, flirty drunk, angry drunk, sleepy drunk, etc) and act that way for the night, all with the requisite bottle-in-a-paper-bag. They got all sorts of nasty looks from the local folk, and it was all just good clean fun. Funny how that works.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

One of my friends told me a story about his uncle who was drunk one time. My friend was at a table with his family and his uncle starts yelling because of something, and his pants fall down. He keeps yelling and then he falls down.

Many times people think I'm high. =/

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I've never gotten drunk either, Drex. However, I have heard that if you go without sleep for over a day or so the sleep deprivation will show off what kind of a drunk you would be. I'm a happy drunk. =)

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

You mean besides a tired drunk? =P I think that means I'd be either a playful drunk or a pissy drunk, because I've seen both aspects of personality blaze forth in glory upon severe sleep deprivation.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I think I would be the overly happy and sociable drunk. As in, the one that thinks absolutely EVERYTHING is hilarious. Why do I say that? Well, quite simply, I've been buzzed before. Yeah, I've tried a little alcohol. Didn't really like it. But I got buzzed. And everything was just insanely, ridiculously funny to me, especially things that I said. Everyone thought it was hilarious that I thought everything was hilarious. Gooooood times.

I was speaking idiomatically.

*sigh*

I have too many situations like these to count. I happen to be intoxicated right now thanks to my Grandma's birthday and I consider browsing the forums in this state of mind one excursion I'm all too familiar with. Alcohol merely accentuates my optimism! I suppose that makes me a 'happy drunk,' opposed to the 'mean/stupid drunk' most people familiarize with the habit. There have been times that my best friend got so drunk that he climbed on top of our local super market until the cops came armed with tranquilizer guns. There have been times I've been so drunk that I walked 5 miles to my ex-girlfriends house just so her and her mother could cook me dinner. These kinds of experiences aren't something to be proud of, but they are certainly ones that build character.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I don't really drink too often, and even when I do I don't get too drunk. In fact, I can only recount two times when I've actually been drunk.

The first time, me and my friends were playing some kind of drinking game. Eventually, it stopped being a game, and we were just drinking to drink, just mixing different shit together and stuff. After one drink combination (I have no idea what it was) everything became funny to me. And I mean everything. If anyone talked (no matter what they said), I laughed. If I tried to take another drink, I laughed. Shit, I was annoying myself, so I know my friends must have been annoyed as well.

The second time, I was actually drunk enough to go streaking. An almost 300-pound black guy running down the street naked in the middle of the night cannot be a good image. The worst part was that I tripped on the way back to my friend's house, so I was naked with grass all over me.

How ya doing, buddy?

Um, being part of a co-ed frat, I can't claim to have not had my share of alcohol and more then my fair share of drunken revelry stories.

I am the exceedingly happy, don't give a shit drunk (though to my credit, I am not the worst in my group... I can count the times I've gotten very drunk on one hand, and I've never had a blackout). The one time I booted, I discovered that jungle juice does not taste good coming back up. The more drunk I am, the better I am at beruit (also known as beer pong with quarters for you ping-pong-ball-users). The combination of a full bottle of wine, some beer, and a white russian does not equal a fun morning after. And there is no rules against using cleavage to occupy masculine opponents during a game of beruit. There was one time, however, when my beruit partner (a good friend of mine) was exceedingly drunk, and decided that cleavage wasnt doing enough, shouted "You need to show 'em something they haven't seen before!" and tried pulling down my pants. The result was a knee to his gut.

Then there was the time I had to drive a ridiculously drunk brother home, because he had decided to drive to a party and would have had to leave his truck there if I didnt drive him... only a few weeks later did I learn that there had been a few kegs and several 30-racks in the back of his truck... and I'm underage.

And the friend who couldnt figure out why the door wouldnt open all the way, or why there was a sudden pain in his head everytime he TRIED to pull the door open... he was trying to open the door and was too drunk to notice that his own body/head was in the way.

I have way too many of these stories... and the sad thing is, I was sober for most of them...

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

I have a great time when drinking and being close to being drunk. I hate being really drunk and regretting it the next day, so I try to maintain some sort of equilibrium. When I first started drinking when I was 20, I got pretty drunk a couple of times. I could walk straight and talk more than ever, but I was kind of... well... not too sure, mainly because I can't remember much of it. I am glad I got home though. Living on campus helps.

I am a pretty happy guy when drinking and getting drunk. If I am upset, then I don't drink much.... even if I try. Which is probably a good thing because they say you shouldn't drink when depressed.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I'm the same as Acer. I've never actually been drunk, but sleep deprivation can come pretty close to the same effects. Going by that I'd definitely be a happy drunk since I often end up sitting around, laughing constantly at my own thoughts.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

On New Year's eve I got incredibly emotional after midnight, after having been in a quietly escalating drunken rage at my mother all through dinner. I wandered around talking to myself outside for an hour and it was really bizarre.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I don't drink very often but I think there have been 4 times in my entire life that I've been really drunk and I'm going on 27 at the moment.

When I do drink I try to set a limit to myself, because the last thing I want to do is end up hurting anyone's feelings. So the times that I have been drunk I tend to be a very quiet drunk and try my best not to say anything. The most horrible thing about when I over-exceed my amount of alcohol consumption I tend to completely black out. I think three out of four times I've been drunk I have no memory of that part of the night.

Here is one of my stories:

1.) One time I went drinking with some of my buddies I had met through university. I promised him that one of my free weekends I would come to visit him. Him and his buddies are absolutely great to be around and talk with and they tell the greatest stories and can be some of the most witty sarcastic people of all time. Basically I had initially started off that night with just a half case of budweiser. Throughout the night, that got mixed in with a few types of alcohol I should of had second thoughts of:

The type of alcohol I ended up drinking that night:
6 bottles of budweiser
3 bottles of homebrew
a few shots of jagrmeister or as I like to call it(Alcoholic NyQuil)
a few shots of of jim bean

I knew I was drunk but I was having such a riot listening to the guys stories and we were listening to a lot of KMFDM in the basement at the time. The last memory I have, is that I needed to go to the bathroom, and then I have no idea what happened afterwards, my mind was a complete blank. The next memory is that I had somehow made it upstairs to his friends bedroom on his bed. I had no idea how I got there, and when my friend woke me up we were ready to go, and then he told I had made a complete puken mess in his friends basement bathroom but told me not to worry about it, because I was really worried I didn't intend to make a scene, but they're planning was to get me drunk that night anyway, so overall it was really good. The funny thing is the next morning I had no hangover whatsoever, I felt the best kind and just really refreshed.

Thankfully out of all the times I ever been drinking that was the first time I ever needed to puke because of overconsumption of alcohol. Overall its still a great time and they still tell some of the ridicously funny stories of all time.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I lost count of my 'drunken excursions' many years ago. There's been tears, laugher, blazing rows, sexual contact and of course, lots and lots of puke. Some of my best (and most vague) memories were while I was bladdered.

I love it, and hate it.

Most amazing jew boots

My most memorable drunken excursion was when I had an alcoholic black-out at a Ukrainian wedding. I went through three litres of vodka and two litres of wine, and ended falling into a ditcnh, and then falling asleep in the ditch. I'll add more later when I'm sober.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

OO already made this thread. Although, admittedly, if he'd put it in the right spot instead of the kitchen it probably would have gotten much more attention. My favorite drinking excursion is in that thread.

Truth be told... I'm actually really hungover right now and thus don't have the energy to type this out.

FELIPE NO

Drunken excursions, eh... mine have resulted in ridiculous wrestling matches, out-of-nowhere reggae dance parties, and absurd games to Taboo (among other random such games). It's fun to see how much people suddenly fail at those games when inebriated. I never got too drunk too much, and I only let it happen when I knew I'd be okay for it the following day or something. I've passed out before, but my friends took me home. Though one timr they left me on my vacuum cleaner... =p

But yeah, being drunk in general makes me more open and a bit crazier than usual.

How ya doing, buddy?

We need a poll to know who's been drunk and who hasn't.

Well, I used to get wasted pretty often. My fondest memory is the day after Christmas, 2003. I was with my brother and his girlfriend and we went to the Stratosphere hotel parking lot... We bought a bottle of cheap Vodka and my brother was shocked to see me drink straight from it in gulps. Kinda like Willy Wonka in that Western Movie... Blazing Saddles.

I was depressed about the holidays. About finally having my brother in my life and the great sadness it gave me because I knew I'd probably be going to prison soon and I wasn't going to run from my fate. So I drank and drank and we crossed the street to the Sahara casino to check out the rollercoaster but the attendants wouldn't let me on.

All I remember after that is throwing up while in the drivethru for Carl's Junior. After that just waking up the next day with a horrible hangover and throwing down a couple of Famous Big Stars.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Duc Eragon

Ok, so this is it! The Best Forum ever posted. Does Someone know someone who has a Mugen Char name Inyasha and Ibuki. I want them hard! PLZ HELP ME!!!!

NO!

As for drunken excursions, I have had a few. I mentioned one in the thread that Ence mentioned a while back, but I have another.

It was my 21st, me and a few mates from college decided to go to the pub after finishing college. We spent a couple of hours in one pub having a good time until we decided it was time to get something to eat. We moved to another pub and ordered food and more beer. Except there was one thing wrong, it was the stuff from the bottom of the barrel and tasted horrible. I managed half a pint before moving onto the next pub, by this time I was feeling very dodgy, but soldiered on.

When we got to the next pub, we ordered a couple of pints each (they were doing them half price), we chose a table, and my mates that were with me at the time decided that they would have a game of darts, I decided to pass and sit at the table and watch. Events after this are hazy at best, let's just say that there was vomit involved, and I had a horrible hangover in the morning.

I have never been back to that pub that I had the beer from the bottom of the barrel. I was find up until then, it really spoiled the night, was only 8pm when I left as well. (We started around lunchtime)

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Bottom of the barrel ale is generally not good? I didn't know that since I generally stick to bottles. Even at bars.

Also, I've found that putting my head down when I'm sitting and feel the need to vomit helps a lot. Look at my profile picture to see this technique in practice.

How ya doing, buddy?

The worst experience I had was when I drank too many different types of hard liquor. A shot of Tequila, vodka, rum, and whiskey all within one hour. Oh God, that was a horrible night. After those shots, I completely blacked out. The next thing I know, I'm puking in the bathroom. The next day, I had the worst hang over that lasted the whole day.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by Harry Mason

Bottom of the barrel ale is generally not good? I didn't know that since I generally stick to bottles. Even at bars.

Also, I've found that putting my head down when I'm sitting and feel the need to vomit helps a lot. Look at my profile picture to see this technique in practice.

Well, it was either bad barrel beer or detergent. It really did taste like a cleaning product.
I think that when beer is stored in a barrel all the bad stuff sinks to the bottom, so that when someone gets to that part of the barrel they get the worse part of the beer.

Putting my head down on the table didn't really help me out. Most times it does though, in this case it didn't.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I got a good one~

I was sitting at a bar with buddies a month or two back, and we got around to nagging this one dude about his love life. He's a big-time charmer, and has women all over him all the time. He then admitted that he could get some women genuinely angry at him from time to time. Even got slapped due to some comments! O'course, we couldn't see this. He's a real nice guy and girls stick to him like shit on velcro.

Then one dude there laid out twenty dollars on the table. Said "get a woman to legitimately slap you within five minutes and you can have this." Needless to say, he had money to blow, and the conversation was boring him.

"That's too easy."
"Yeah, but you only get one shot. It has to be visible from over here. Finally, you have to pull it off in three phrases."
"What do you mean?"
"We'll watch you. You say something, she says something, you say something, she says something, you say something. That's three phrases. And no asking the girl to slap you. Nate here can read lips."

Sadly, we do have a friend who can read lips, and he was playing "observer".

So, Thunder (the buddy who is to be slapped. His name is Nick but we call him Thunder for some unknown reason) stands up and wanders around.

I'm looking at my watch, and it hits the four-minute mark. I raise my hand and tap it, gesturing for him that he has one minute. He nods, acting real laid back. He later told me that he was "casing the broads". He spotted the winner -- some real hot gal, but she had an air of bitchiness to her. Real primmed and all that stuff.

He walks over, noticing she is on her feet, wandering around. It's a crowded bar and she was looking for a place to sit down.

Thunder approached her and it went a little like this:

"Heya. How ya doin'?"
"Uhm... I'm doing okay..."
"Looking for a place to sit?"
"Yeah, actually."
"Here. Lemme clean off a place for ya."

Thunder then reached up and wiped his mouth clean.

Sure enough!

The hand cocked back and did some odd sorta wave/quiver motion before WHACK. He got slapped, and laughed in her face once before running back over to us screaming "TWENTY DOLLAHS TWENTY DOLLAHS!"

Then he tripped over someone's foot, landed face-down, and passed out. Sean, needless to say, was entertained. "Hah! He earned my money, thats for sure".

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by Harry Mason

Look at my profile picture to see this technique in practice.

Shit, forgot I changed my profile pic. Here you go.

Originally Posted by Trigunnerz

The worst experience I had was when I drank too many different types of hard liquor. A shot of Tequila, vodka, rum, and whiskey all within one hour.

Same here. It was on my birthday from the picture above. First started with a liter of Gallo beer. Then the shots came. First a double whiskey, then a double tequila, a double rum and finally a double Vodka. They started getting creative so they gave me a good sized glass of red wine. Then I resumed just beer. At some point I started threatening the particular friend that was sending this shit to my table. Not long afterwards I was DONE with my head down like a woman.

Nastiest hangover I've ever had.

FELIPE NO

Its getting to be more and more situations of drunkeness. but i'll only name 2.

First funny one:

One night I was out bowling with some friends. Decided to start drinking Smirnoff Vodka Coolers(good stuff) and I ended up drinking like 10 or 11 of them. I was completely smashed. I remember finishing the game of bowling but then thats the last. Next thing I know, I'm waking up at home. My phone is on the floor in peices, I'm not wearing any clothes and my shirt is laying folded up on my computer desk.

Situation 2:

This one is very recent. I was at a social, and got good and drunk. then it was time to go home. I managed to bus from the social to downtown. But then it was already 230 in the morning. The buses stop running around that time. So i managed to hitchhike home. Hitchhiking home whilst drunk is kinda fun. lol.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by Trigunnerz

The worst experience I had was when I drank too many different types of hard liquor. A shot of Tequila, vodka, rum, and whiskey all within one hour.

If you mix those all together you have what's called The Four Horsemen and I guess it gets its name on account that it's armageddon on your will to live the next morning.

Jam it back in, in the dark.