Worst Christmas Songs Ever

So, holidays are here and radio stations have been playing Christmas music for the last month. Which ones are so bad you actually turn off the radio instead of switching for another station for fear of hearing it there?

Be sure to wait for the chorus!

YouTube Video

I can only assume Italian was some sort of racial slur at the time this song was recorded.

YouTube Video

This is the kind of song that makes you want to mailbomb the radio station.

YouTube Video

Jam it back in, in the dark.

YouTube Video

Most amazing jew boots

you're welcome

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Oh my god knk, I love you! Laughing forever~

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I always think back to this, a gift my mate received from a family member with a wicked sense of humour perhaps, or maybe just a real liking for reggae?



No samples I'm afraid. The cds whereabouts are unknown. It is unlikely to have survived to the present day.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Aw, fuck you guys. Dominic the Donkey is a fucking great Christmas song. ;_;

(I hate that U2 Don't They Know It's Christmastime shit. Every time I hear it, I am reminded of how I want to smash Bono's face in.)

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by Sassafrass

(I hate that U2 Don't They Know It's Christmastime shit. Every time I hear it, I am reminded of how I want to smash Bono's face in.)

I think that's Band Aid? Which means you hate more than one band.

God, I hate that one song that's all "Last christmas I gave you my heart". Also not a fan of the one that goes 'So here it is, Merry Christmas time, it's only just begun'. I think it's a Beatles song but it still sucks and is repetitive.

FELIPE NO

Thank God someone posted that hippo song, I've hated that song with a passion for years.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Awww I love the Hippo song. Hallmark actually had an ornament this year that played that song

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Fuck all of you.



No great videos exist so I've uploaded some torture instead.

Get the Flash Player to play this audio file:
Jingle Cats - Ode to Joy

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I do not only have Meowy Christmas, but Christmas Unleashed, made with dog sounds, and A Froggy Christmas, made with the sounds of frogs, and Woody Phillips' A Toolbox Christmas, made with the sounds of power tools.

Honestly, I'm surprised no one has brought up Christmas In The Stars: The Star Wars Christmas Album. Nothing says Christmas quite like C-3P0 singing about how unlikely it is that the entire universe celebrates a holiday on December 25th.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I hate that Paul McCartney song WITH A PASSION.

This one

This one. It sucks. I think it's the fact that the fucking synth delay doesn't match up with the rest of the song and it sounds like it's falling apart and it fucking makes my head hurt badly.

And I can't find Socko the Smallest Snowball. That song.


That song.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Get the Flash Player to play this audio file:
The real version of this. This version kicks ass (except to shin, who is a limey bitch) but the original is just so awful. It doesn't even have rhythm.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Sure it has Jack Johnson on the compilation but the rest of it is mired in mediocre bands and unfunny skits from otherwise funny radio personalities.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I wonder why no one brought up the obvious one
Error; are you sure that's a YouTube link?

Eat my shorts.

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by Sassafrass

(I hate that U2 Don't They Know It's Christmastime shit. Every time I hear it, I am reminded of how I want to smash Bono's face in.)

Yeah, that's Band Aid and you can blaim Bob Geldof and Midge Ure for that, Bono was merely a small part of the whole thing. Look:

YouTube Video

See, you can now hate Sting, George Michael, Boy George, Phil Collins and all sorts of other British 80's pop stars!

Did you know, this song went from being written to being released in just 3 days? Also, by all accounts the Quo made more money selling drugs backstage at the Live Aid concert than they donated to the actual charity.

edit: But yes, Bono does need a good smack in the mouth.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Who needs another reason to hate Phil Collins?

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Little Drummer boy but its good that Bob Seger sings a version of it but still " That song makes me want to have one of my favorite songs in my head instead

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I would say Silent Night is not one of my favourites, not even close. Its sounded good the first time but after that, it is kind of depressing. And that song "Santa Baby"..... Ugh...

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.