[Multiplatform] James Bond Returns In... A Ridiculously Titled Game

YouTube Video

Spoiler:

OPENING CREDITS SONG ("WHEN NOBODY LOVES YOU")
Written by Kerli & Richard Fortus

PRODUCED AND ARRANGED BY
David Maurice

PERFORMED BY
Kerli

SCORE WRITTEN BY
Christopher Lennertz

Everyone here played the stroke-off N64 Goldeneye game and most others snubbed the excellent (possibly superior) Everything Or Nothing years later. Well, we're out of the Brosnan years for Bond and now Daniel Craig is back for his second go-around as the man who could kick Jack Bauer's ass while cooking Jason Bourne's breakfast.

First off, the song for the game is much, much better than the song in the movie. Its not AMAZING but the song for QoS by White and Keys is fucking godawful, maybe worse than what Madonna did for Die Another Day.

I also love me some FPS spy action. The graphics look pretty good and the gameplay seems... exactly like Goldeneye, plus the Bourne Conspiracy takedown system.

YouTube Video

Thoughts?

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Looks kind of cool. Who's the developer? I heard EA lost the license years ago.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Everything or Nothing was the shit. Co-op was mad fun, and deathmatch felt like Power Stone with Bond characters. I've been meaning to pick it up but I haven't been able to find it lately.

QoS is looking to be the game that could actually rival Goldeneye 64, if not dethrone it altogether. Can't wait to play a demo.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by SCHNEE-4

Looks kind of cool. Who's the developer? I heard EA lost the license years ago.

Uh, Treyarch. Yes, that Treyarch.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I had the honor of playing the Wii version about two months ago, it was fucking horrible. I'm looking forward to playing the complete game, it'll be fucking horrible.

(Play the real version on 360/PS3, it'll probably be slightly less fucking horrible).

I was speaking idiomatically.

Ive noticed that when a game goes to all three major systems - the Wii version is like the retarded kid brother that keeps walking into walls.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Bond driving a left hand drive Aston? Epic fail right there.

FELIPE NO

Hehehehe, good eye. I didn't even notice that.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by GARUDA-2

Uh, Treyarch. Yes, that Treyarch.

This.

This fact alone throws a huge question mark over it. Unlike the new Call of Duty Treyarch don't have an excellent predecessor game made by a better company to rip off. Guess we'll see though, but I'm not holding out much hope.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by Garr

I know there have been more games since then, but nothing really seemed to catch my eye.

Everything Or Nothing is absolutely fantastic. You have to love a game where you get bonus points for giving a woman a massage or blowing up shit with a RC car.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

How good is this game you ask?

YouTube Video

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I rented it and planned to buy it back when it was released. I never got around to doing it.

Do people still play that online?

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I... didn't even know EON had multiplayer, since my copy was for the Gamecube.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I played it on PS2 and, although I never played it online (because my launch PS2 didn't have a network adapter), I'm sure there was a squad-based multiplayer portion to be played online to unlock some of the arena levels.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Eurogamer have their review up, and I'll paste some choice quotes to highlight my complete lack of surprise:

Quote:

It's Bond! With Gears of War cover mechanics and the Call of Duty 4 engine! How can it possibly fail? As it turns out, by being dull, repetitive, unchallenging, ruinously linear, and one of the shortest full-priced games ever.

Quote:

Almost every step of the way you feel like the game has been designed for complete idiots with zero attention span.

Not sure if they meant 'designed for' or 'designed by', but both probably apply.

Quote:

Rather than giving the Bond game its Casino Royale moment, Activision and Treyarch have simply carried on in the joyless tradition of dumbed-down shooters designed for thickos

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by WolfDemon

Everything or Nothing was the shit...

Quoted for truth.
EoN being, as you put it, 'the shit' is one reason I still have a PS2 around (others including Ace Combat 4 and 5; Warship Gunner 2; and The Red Star). I have yet to try out FRwL (but that shouldn't be too hard to find in discount bins); Rogue Agent had some interesting ideas but didn't quite make the cut.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Picked it up yesterday. I've been playing it on the highest difficulty and its not overwhelmingly hard. Its a basic FPS - the story is pretty thin and/or crap since they keep 007 movies under wraps while in production.

Achievements are plenty and well-named. For most, I'd say its a rental but since I love James Bond movies, its definitely about my speed.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I suppose the new barrel sequence is where Craig is about to be shot then turns around toward the camera. I think it's cool, but if it's the same thing every time, it will get old.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Bought, played and beat. Very good - just very short. A lot of jerks will complain that its straight forward and offers no innovation and thats fine by me. Its a game that makes you feel like James Bond and thats a heck of a great thing.

Most of the achievements are easy - 007 Difficulty is a touch tougher than most games on Normal, so a good player should be able to get through this game in 6 or 7 sittings, maybe less. Great music by Chris Lennertz, which is very similar to View To A Kill and Living Daylights.

Score - 8/10

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.