How do you ask out a girl...

...over the counter?

There's this real cute chick who works at the best bakery in town (this place is wodnerful even if she dind't work there) and yeah, she's really cute. I think we've met once before, a couple of years ago applying for some job togethor (neither of us got it) and we really clicked. Her name might've been rebecca but I'm not sure.

So yeah how the fuck do you ask someone out over the counter? this is a brave new setting. I pretty much do not see her out of her workplace.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I've been out of the dating scene for quite a while now, but if I were to try something like this, I'd at least get on a first-name basis with her first. Next time you spot her, just say "I've seen you a lot here, my name is ____. What's yours?"

It's better than "I saw your name on your tag, Rebecca. Let's go dating~" Or so I would think! Stay on a first-name basis, get chatty whenever you visit. A few visits after you have her name and she knows you a little, just ask her out. "Asking her out" sounds pretty vague, but there are only a few ways to do it in words :3

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Ive tried a couple different ways and found there are two effective ones...

1.) Open with something like "Look, this is kind of weird but..."

Generally if you lead in with something like that they can brace themselves for the rest. Be brave because women don't like weak men.

2.) Get drunk

Beer muscles go a long way, kid, believe you me.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by LeHah

2.) Get drunk

Beer muscles go a long way, kid, believe you me.

I don't know how kosher a drunk at a bakery would be. If the place is open all-night, then it's cool. Bakeries expect drunks after midnight anyway. Well, drunks and the occasional super-fan who wants the freshest stuff that's prepared for the early morning rush of donut and danish buying.

But yeah, being drunk to ask a girl out while she's at work might not fly so well.
Maybe one beer would work, but more than that and your potential to look like a douche bag increases exponentially.

How ya doing, buddy?

No need for the liquid confidence... just stroll in there and tell her how it's going to be. Be confident, and maybe a little sarcastic. But definitely don't start with "Look, this is kind of weird but..." You're a guy and she's a girl, and you wanna ask her out. Why would that be kinda weird? It should be the most natural thing in the world.

If she gives you the "I have a boyfriend" bit, don't despair. It's merely a small hurdle.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I hate, hate, hate drunk guys. Not only would I say no to a date with someone who asked me out while drunk, I'd probably tell him off for good measure.

I do think the confidence thing is where it's at. There's nothing more attractive than confidence. Period.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Just walk up to her, and ask her out. If you can find out a little bit about her and use that as a way to start conversation. Just ask her out to lunch or dinner, maybe to a movie, something simple.

Being drunk will just get you thrown out and starting off with some pickup line or "this is kind of weird but..." probably isn't going to fly real well, depending on the girl.

How ya doing, buddy?

Originally Posted by Gumby

Being drunk will just get you thrown out and starting off with some pickup line or "this is kind of weird but..." probably isn't going to fly real well, depending on the girl.

Definitely. It's important to realize that what works for LeHah probably wouldn't work for anyone else.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Lehah also told me on AIM that If I tell her I like blueberry muffins and we fuck on the shitter then she'll be mine for life.
He's made similar connections between anal sex and marraige before invovling other women.
I really want Vestin's opinion on all of this.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I dunno, as someone who works behind a counter (diner/restaurant place), I'd think that if a guy customer started off with 'this is kinda weird but...', that would just make it something more to laugh about. Its hard to describe, but at least with a line like that in the front, it lets the girl behind the counter KNOW that you know you're going out on a limb, and its not terribly awkward afterwards. And I dont think that line takes away from the confidence factor at all, because you're asking out this girl you dont really know... thats confidence right there.

Granted, I've never been asked out at work, and I doubt it will happen any time soon.

But yeah, I'd say get to know her by showing up as a regular customer (not too often, thats just sketchy) and chatting with her. Maybe even ask if you know her from that job interview. It'd be a great starting topic.

Oh yeah, and the drunk thing? Not a chance in hell.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I remember last time when I was working part-time job in a restaurant, I received a little note from a frequent customer and a cute hair-clip with some crystal things on it. He just dropped in the note and the hair-clip in the morning to make it look like he made time for it even when he was busy and was on his way to work. Then I remember I was telling him how the boss wanted me to put my hair up while working there etc.

I thought that was kinda sweet. And I thought about it for a few days until he came back to the restaurant in the weekend. So when he asked me out to watch movie, it was easy.

Maybe you can think of something to give her, a token, something meaningful to give her, not extravagant, just something small. Try to talk to her to see what she likes or what she needs. I think girls like to have something (no matter how little) to hold on to, so when she sees the thing you give her, she remembers you. It makes you a little bit more special than the other customers.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by Temari

I dunno, as someone who works behind a counter (diner/restaurant place), I'd think that if a guy customer started off with 'this is kinda weird but...', that would just make it something more to laugh about. Its hard to describe, but at least with a line like that in the front, it lets the girl behind the counter KNOW that you know you're going out on a limb, and its not terribly awkward afterwards. And I dont think that line takes away from the confidence factor at all, because you're asking out this girl you dont really know... thats confidence right there.

I agree with what she says. I think the "This is weird, but..." line would be endearing and help break the ice a little. Sure girls want confidence, but not to the point of arrogance (which you guys are not careful enough about... Arrogance is a HUGE turn-off). Saying this line will show your human side a bit--it's kind of cute when a guy sees a girl he really likes and gets a little nervous--but at the same time, she's not gonna doubt that you're gutsy if you're asking her out over-the-counter.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

That sounds unbearably cute joeymui and while I am impressed with this guy's move, that is just not a RABicle thing to do.

I was speaking idiomatically.

RAB, if you want to avoid being cutesy, you could always just tell her she's a fistworthy chick and you'd like to take her out for a double-fisted date.

Most amazing jew boots

In all seriousness, whatever you do, don't say something like, "We should hang out sometime." It's really awkward when you're not sure if you've been asked out or not. I like it much better when someone just comes right out and asks me for a date. That way there's no confusion.

FELIPE NO

Originally Posted by Alice

It's really awkward when you're not sure if you've been asked out or not.

YES. It's really frustrating too, if the girl likes you back and you say something ambivalent like that. I *hate* when I can't tell the difference between "friendly" and "interested." >_<.
Just try to be a 'regular' in the sense that you talk to her a lot, and once you're on a pretty friendly basis you can ask her out to lunch or coffee or something. Coffee might be the best first step, but what the hell do I know.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

You guys seem to be talking fairly longterm in the asking out process. I was thinking of asking her out next weekish.

I have to do everything megaspeed since I leave town in two months.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

How long of a day does she work? If its a pretty long ass time then why don't you offer to take her out for a bite or something like that, It'll make it WAY easier to break the ice than risk getting shot down...especially when there is a chance for lots of people to see it.

How ya doing, buddy?

Yeah I havent been stalking her thoroughly enough yet to determine her working hours. I'm pretty sure she is there fulltime though, and I've noticed she it not there towards the end of the afternoon so I think she starts earlyish.
I mean, I visited Thursday at 2 and she was tehre. Tody at 4, not there.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Hell, if you've talked to her before and it seemed to gone off well why not try? Just mention it to her, see if she remembers. If she doesn't she'll, at the least, remember the job you were both applying for and you can work from there. THIS is the part that always gets me thinking before I act, but once you break that ice you're in. Unless she doesn't care for you in that sense, of course.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Why post on the board and ask for advice if you're leaving in two months? Bite the bullet (I'm a hypocrite, but I learn from my mistakes!). Say, "Hi, what's your name?" followed by "Are you free this weekend", "Would you like to have lunch with me sometime?" "Here is my number"... seriously, there are so many ways to ask a girl out! And remember to be nice and smile. Good luck.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Originally Posted by RABicle

Lehah also told me on AIM that If I tell her I like blueberry muffins and we fuck on the shitter then she'll be mine for life.

I said "in the shitter" not "on the shitter"

But your version is infinitely more hysterical.

How ya doing, buddy?

When I first read your post I imagined you fucking someone while in this huge toilet. Now every time I read one of your posts I'm going to think of that because it's such a hilarious mental image.

FELIPE NO

Christ sakes! The problem with her working at a bakery is this; everything i cn possibly buy is within arms reach from her, so I have mere seconds to chat. And there is the other big problem thatshe's like, not just working at the till but she spends a lot of time preparing food out the back. I mean yesterday when I went in I saw her making stuff out back.

Tomorrow, if she's in, I'll ask her out. I'm thinking of leading with the line "Hey, I know I don't know you that well but, would you like to go out some time?" And we'll see. Also I think if I order a coffee from them they make it up tehe behind the counter, which gives me precious added time. I should've done that todfay but I only got the idea today after some other customer ordered one.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Yeah, do it man. I wanna see two threads in this forum reach resolution. Just don't overanalyse/overthink things.

Jam it back in, in the dark.