Do you have a criminal record?

Well, do ya, punk?!

If so, what did you do to get it? Drink and drive? Shoplift? Stab someone in the heart with a rusty fork?!

Me? I'm 100% clean. No official criminal record whatsoever. :dealer:

Sure, I've done a lot of things that could be considered illegal, but nothing serious, and nothing that I've gotten caught doing.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Nope, nothing on my record either.

Although I was close to being reported by employees at Target after trying to steal a game. They let me off the hook... I still don't know why though. Sympathy?

There's nowhere I can't reach.

haha does it count if it is sealed?

How ya doing, buddy?

The closest I got to having a criminal record was in my teens; it wasn't that exciting, a friend and I bunked the last two lessons of school, intending to run away from home too when I got cold feet. I persuaded her to walk into town and then we called my mother, saying we'd been abducted by a group of men at knifepoint because we were so afraid of admitting we were to blame for our actions (my god it still gets me now how stupid I was). Anyway, the police were called out and we were interviewed, and eventually they got the truth out of us. The officer said he wasn't going to put it on our records (I forget why, possibly out of sympathy for my idiocy). Apart from that little incident I'm quite innocent as far as the law knows.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

I've got a clean record. The closest I ever came was this one time after a night out. There were some guys hassling a friend of mine, and she threw a drink at them. I put myself in between her and them, and when the cops came, they were taking the side of these other guys.

Normally I respect the law, and those who enforce it, but these cops were seriously going to blame her for some drunken assholes who were putting the moves on her. That shit was just so unbelivably lame, and I told them "You should be ashamed to call yourself police officers."

They didn't like that much, understandably, and they gave me some crap, and told me that I should give them their due respect. I told them that if they wanted to arrest me, that was fine, but I wasn't about to back down. I fully expected to be charged that night, but they let me go.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I've been brought to the Police station and had pictures and fingerprints taken of me.

For what?

Because a friend got his freaking air soft gun out during like 30 seconds in a town square. Someone flipped out and called the cops who arrived with their own guns out going all "raise your hands! YOUR HANDS MOTHERFUCKER!!" at us. =/

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Nope, my record is clean. I try to be a civil as possible. You know, not trying to break the law or anything. I don't even have a ticket yet for driving infractions...

*Knock on wood*

FELIPE NO

100% clean... thanks to a clerk's generosity. But ever since (7 years or so), I never was tempted

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I am clean as well. I've been caught with weed on me a couple times, but a lot of the cops around here are cool, so they just took it. One cop made me break my pipe, I was so pissed about that.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

When I was fifteen, I was detained, fingerprinted and all that at the Juvenile Detention center for several hours after a domestic disturbance. I'd rather not divulge the specifics, but "the disturbance" was part of a series of similar... rebellions(?) that I made my parents suffer through between 7th and 9th grade.

I blame Catholic School.

Regardless, my unruly behavior sort of trended downward after that.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

I consider myself a respectable and decent citizen. However, when I was younger, obo 15, my friends and I (including Maneve), made a habit of 'borrowing' my parents' vehicles (They are car dealers). I was, however, lucky enough not to get caught.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

I have a criminal record.

One black mark was from my driving on a suspended license without my knowing it. (I seriously didn't know.) The officer was nice enough not to arrest me, it being 2am and having other people in the car with me. He just asked that someone with a valid license drive home with me and the like.

The second, rather large black mark is for trespassing, malicious destruction of property over $2,500, and breaking and entering, which was later dropped.

My two girlfriends and I ended up in the high school we graduated from. We had to pee, and since the only thing local was the high school and there were night classes being held, we went in and peed.

Sure, we took maybe 20 minutes in the bathroom, remembering all the good times in that bathroom. But when we walked out, we noticed all the lights were off and the doors were CHAIN LOCKED shut.

We went wandering around, innocently at first looking at everything at night. And then we found the teacher's lounge - where the SERIOUSLY kept WHIPPED CREAM AND EGGS in the fridge. We decided it was fate, and we went to town.

Eventually, the night crew caught us. Long story short, we ended up in court paying $800 a piece for reparations.

Thats still on my record from years ago. O WELL.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by BaronBee

I consider myself a respectable and decent citizen. However, when I was younger, obo 15, my friends and I (including Maneve), made a habit of 'borrowing' my parents' vehicles (They are car dealers). I was, however, lucky enough not to get caught.

I got caught doing that once, but by my parents thankfully. I was in 8th grade and we drove my friend's mom's car all over the backroads by my dad's house, and returned to my father standing in the driveway, with me behind the wheel. Apparently one of our neighbors saw us and called my mom at work. That was fun, he made me split and stack firewood every day after school for three weeks.

I was speaking idiomatically.

Nay. No criminal record for me nor any driving infractions (no license yet! ha!).

I only got in trouble in high school for minor things, like playing games in the lab, bypassing securities, getting people's passwords, being ridiculously awesome in class, i.e. getting detention (usually french...), or being late.

College was more fun as I'd join in on our "riots" after various sporting events, as we crowd the streets and set stuff on fire. It's fun to run away from the police anti-mod squad with their bats, shields, and rubber bullets. I've never been shot though. I guess there's also the bunch of antics/pranks I did in college with friends. One, involving the placement of a large Kool-Aid Man stand-up in front of a large hole in a brick wall that a truck had crashed though, almost got us in trouble because apparently they put some banner up to cover it... but that banner was missing when we were operating our mission. That was awesome.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

I'm clean. I done things that probably would have gotten me a criminal record. Let's just say it involved breaking and entering into a school and having a bit of fun. I was the one that broke in, and my mate was lookout.

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I'm clean. But i don't even know what is legal and what's not so that i would be recorded as a criminal but i'm lucky: i've never been caught up. I always breack the laws that i juge unneeded or annoying. If you ask about me you'll find that i'm an angel at people's eyes!!!!

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Despite being clean, I do have multible driving infringements and my fingerprints on file. A cunning plan in Primary School involved an excursion to the police station. "Hey kids we'll take your fingerprints!"
"COOL!"
Wait a minute.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

I've been caught shoplifting Robotussin, had to go to a theft awareness and a drug awareness class for that. The theft awareness class was full of 13-14 year olds who had stolen clothes from Marshall Fields or whatever. I was probably the oldest person there out of those who were there for the class. Kind of embaressing, but whatever. It was a bad idea to steal the shit during daytime. The Drug Awareness class was just a MADD presentation, basically. Most of the people there were there for drinking and driving, I think. I did get a cool book that showed me what every drug looks like. Heh. That was a low point for me, when I had to talk to my parents after being cuffed into the back of the police car.

I also got into some recent trouble. I was in the cemetary after dusk and a cop followed us. I had to go to court and pay a $180 US fine. Bullshit! Theft under 400 dollars or something is a petty misdeameanor, and so is ordinance 33 (in cemetary after dusk) so I believe my record is still clean.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

come on... let's see the hardened criminals posting here...

Me, you ask? Two counts of assisted suicide (both felonies in the state of California). These took place in 1994... I had a girlfriend who was deemed by her doctors as terminal with kidney failure and severe diabetes. Me being a strong supporter of euthanasia became a pawn in a game...
I did not physically assist my girlfriend... I supervised as she was to OD on a mixture of insulin. When she was unconcious I cleaned up and left. But for some reason her family hated me and was keeping tabs on me. Soon after I had left they went over to her place and found her unconcious. 911 was dialed... and even though she never said anything, her family said everything.

Original charge? One count of attempted murder. After a plea bargain with the DA who didn't have a case but was going to drag out the proceedings for as long as he could tossed out the offer of two counts of assisted suicide with time served (I had already spent something like six months in county jail). I hopped at the opportunity to get the fuck out of there... I had gained enough notoriety in the system that I was moved to single-man units for fear that inmates would come to me looking to off themselves.

In the end... time served... two years on probation (supposed to be five but released early for good behaviour)... and that's it aside from interesting stories when having to explain why I have two felonies to potential employers. Even local police who stop me are shocked about the assisted suicide thing. They never knew it was a penal code...

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

My record is clean. However, there was one incident in grade school two years ago that might have gotten me a criminal record. I drew a huge picture of "St. Fuck-Up School" all over the wall inside the small room I worked in (don't ask why). Needless to say, the principal wasn't pleased.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

No, I don't have a criminal record. Hell, I can't even remember anything that comes remotely close to breaking a law or two. Hopefully it stays this way, since there are one or two friends of mine who make it a habit to pass through the system every once in a while.

I was speaking idiomatically.

I feel awfully dull. Not because I don't have a criminal record, not exactly something I'd like to have, but because I can't even think of anything I've done that I could have been arrested for, fined for, or even just told not to do again.

Oh, wait, I drank alcohol at a party once when I was underage. 7 days before I turned 18, which is the legal drinking age around here. Yeah. I'm a hardened criminal.

How ya doing, buddy?

Got caught shoplifting at the start of my 8th grade. It was listed as a minor infraction, and ended up doing 8 hours of community at the city pool because of which. Other than that, I've been clean since--though I have been driving around recently on a suspended license. <-- That was for driving without insurance.

*knock on wood*

FELIPE NO

Don't have one, but when I was a stupid pink kid I stole a couple things but never got caught.

Thankfully I smartened up.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

I don't have a criminal record, but hey, it's only illegal if you get caught.

Speaking of criminal records, my brother got caught shoplifting. Magic cards. From Wal-Mart. Had to do some jail time, pay a fine, and go to some crazy "be a decent citizen" classes. He claims he put them in his pocket and forgot. We all still laugh at him.

Hardcore.

Jam it back in, in the dark.