Help with a girl at work
 

Yeah, I need a little bit of help. I work at a retail store as a part time supervisor, and there is this girl there I really like. I've been talking to her since June, and recently, she started giving me big hugs whenever she saw me. She invited me to a couple of social events (one which she had to back out of, and one that hasn't happened yet), and I got her phone number. We only talked on the phone a few times, and we have sent each other a few text messages. Conversations weren't anything really serious, but she did tell me that because of her new schedule (she would be taking night classes) we wouldn't see each other at work. She wasn't happy about that.

Anyway, before we started talking, someone told me that she liked me. Because I had no idea why she would, and because I never really talked to her before, I decided against asking her out at the beginning, and decided to just talk to her to see if she really does like me. From what I can tell, she might, but she is also a couple of years older than me (and the last girl I liked who was older told me she only liked guys older than her).

So, here is my question: Do I just tell her how I feel about her, ask her out, and hope for the best? Or do I play it safe, go to some social events with her and some people from work, wait a while, and see where it goes from there?

Ask her out before you go into the "we're good friends now and it's too late for me to want to date you" stage lol.

But seriously, ask her out. Sounds like you're being modest on her feelings for you. Even if she does reject you, you still have a nice social buddy. If she accepts, which it seems she most likely will, then hoorah, go have fun :3.

Also, I find it rare that a girl will ask out a guy these days, from experience and stories. Most they seem to do is hint that they like you, and hope you'll pop the question instead, so what you got now is pretty set. You might want to double check with a girl on that statement though haha.

You just need to ask her out on a date and be clear that it's a date.

That'll answer all the questions you need right there.

EDIT: Then you can stick it in her pooter, as well.

Oh, and I agree with what Greykin said about the whole "not going into the friends zone". It's nearly impossible to come out of that once you're in.

Sounds like you got her in the bag already, man. You can close this deal easy.

Ask her out for dinner or coffee sometime, but be sure to keep in mind her schedule. A woman likes it when you remember her schedule. It means you listen. ^_^

But seriously, you're pretty much in. =D

Though I largely agree with you, there is a small drawback that can sometimes result from this.

For instance, it could also mean that you are paying TOO much attention. Some girls don't like it when a person they don't extremely well is memorizing their routines. It might be kind of creepy but this is probably the exception rather than the rule.

Uh, listening to how she WAS UPSET ABOUT NOT SEEING HIM AT WORK due to her schedule change for night classes isn't "listening too much."

Taking advice from Rainman about women is like offering rub-on tattoos at the Holocaust Museum - its just not something a person with a functioning synapse would do.

That aside - you already have this girl into you, which is most of the fight right there. Just say to her "Let me take you out on a date". Don't say "We should hang" because thats passive aggressive and you're both going to wonder if its a date or not. Say its a fucking date and be done with it. Go out for coffee, something small. If you're old enough, take her to a *nice* bar and have a few drinks.

This is of course assuming that women aren't a bit fickle from time to time and every situation is exactly the same. 'UPSET ABOUT NOT SEEING HIM AT WORK' doesn't necessarily mean that mixed signals don't happen from time to time. In that way of thinking, its sometimes important not to be too hasty or too forward, if that makes sense. Perhaps this is overly precautionary...

You know, a person like you, I'd expect you know the difference between "dive" and "nice" bars.

But I don't think drinks is where it's at, myself. It gives off a comfortable, coy feeling - especially if you're going to have drinks. I dunno - I'm fickle like that. I once was asked to be taken to a bar. Maybe it's 'cause I'm a fattie, but I never take men up on offers of drinks. It seems too.....in your face. But that's me. I am sure a lot of women aren't like that.

(Didn't read the other posts)

Wait..you are her supervisor? You are treading dangerous waters depending on how your employer works with relationships.

Casual drinks help you start get to know someone.

They also let you learn how much of a lightweight the girl is - take that anyway you want.

Slash is right, unfortunately. If you are a part-time supervisor, people might become suspicious/jealous of anything that happens in this girl's favor. Furthermore, I think many companies frown on this type of situation (or even have rules against it).

I'm not going to say not to do it, but if this be the case, carefully consider the risk-for both you AND ESPECIALLY her.

If, in the event, you decide to go for it, I agree with people here, but how you go about it may depend on the extent of your relationship with her. If you know each other really well, then a dinner or other appropiate activity for a date. If not, then you can bridge the gap between causal to really knowing her with a few cups of coffee.

Lucky bastard. If you aren't her boss, run to her. If you are her boss, think about how work will affect that.

Supervisor is the same as a boss to someone who is a Sales Associate.

It doesn't matter if you're a Keyholder, Assistant Manager, Store Manager...if you hold a higher ranking than the person you are trying to date...you will be seen as a boss.

There are no gray areas when it comes to this. Its either Black or White

Don't worry about the age thing. Once you're over 18 or 19, once you don't look like a child anymore, women arn't fussed by younger men.

Tha's the breaker.. if she let's you stick in the pooter then yer in for life. Or not, then forget her.. >_<

Fucking Divest. lol.

Well, my advise is... Business and love should NEVER mix... I have learned that in the past b/c it makes things slightly uncomfortable if things go sore. Plus the fact that yer a part time supervisor could risk your job, couldn't it?

But if you are gonna go for it, make sure you go for before you get into the friendship zone because once you get there, you'll never get out. Trust me on that.. Been there, done that..

yeah, in most cases it would seem creepy but the fact that she dropped hints about her schedule is a different story. Now if she hadn't mentioned anything to start with and then you walked up to her and been like "I see yer schedule changed".. that would seem creepy.

I don't know why its such a big deal in this country that you have to date a woman younger than you even if the age range between both of you is above 18 or 20. I mean come on is it because the women get turned off by a man younger than them? Age doesn't have to do with anything. Now if it comes toward the pedophiliac range then thats wrong.

just wanted to vent out on that.

Definitely ask her out, your chances are astronomical. I find it very uncommon that girls act like this when they aren't interested, VERY uncommon.