What to look for before a relationship?
 

I really like this girl. I was not attracted to her physically at first but loved her personality. Now I think she is physically attracting as well. I guess she grew on me. She also loves my personality. On a scale of 10 she would say its 9.5. However, she is not physically attracted to me. Another problem she has is that she says we do not match. What she means by matching is that she is more into clubbing, drinking(not all the time just occasionally) and she said she knows I would be uncomfortable with some of her friends. Other things such as we don't match if 2 people saw us meaning I dress kind of mature while she is more how should I say it stylish? She said she would fit more with someone who dresses like the surfer type. I mean... I thought opposites attract, but I guess not. She is scared of trying because of bad experiences with people that didn't really match her. Another thing is that if we were together she doesn't want to force me to change to like the things she does. Is this what people usually look at? Personality, physical attraction, and .... matching?????

She sounds very shallow minded to me. Matching physically isn't that important, really. It's more a behaviour thing that makes a couple beautiful IMO. It sounds more like she's afraid of what her friends will say about you than anything else...

Unfortunately, it sounds like she's making excuses because she's not into you. Not that someone can really tell over the Internet.

She sounds like she's in high school, or at least, at that level of maturity. She doesn't want to tell you that she's not into you. She's giving you a load of shit and some vague reference to "past experiences." Let me tell you something, I have "past experiences" being an astronaut.

If you follow her logic, she'd never ever enter into a relationship, ever again. Because probably all of the relationships you'll ever have, except for maybe one if you're lucky, will come to an end and it'll have to do with differences.

Find another one, there's always another one.

Yea, no kidding. "Our styles clash - sorry. You wouldn't match my bag and shoes!"

Seriously, like everyone is saying: She's making excuses to avoid hurting you. She won't come out and say she's not into you unless you pressure her or corner her - which I wouldn't recommend doing. (Diasterous if you feel like keeping her as a friend)

Like Duo said, there are plenty of nice, stable, more mature girls out there. Make yourself a challenge and find one! =D

Yeah, I agree with Sass and Duo.

To me, by the way you've described her she sounds like she's 14 and she wants to stay 14. Regardless of her age is--I'm guessing if she's old enough to be dating, drinking and clubbing she's older probably than that--but again, she looks like she's not looking for a relationship for the sake of being with someone for mature reasons either. I'm sorry, the last time I ever heard a girl say "omg, we should so be together because we match and we look so perfect together!" was in middle school. Mid-high school, maybe.

I totally agree. Anyone who would go as far as say that you guys don't "match" is just her running out of excuses to tell you that she doesn't want to be together. Who the hell matches anyhow?

Look for if she's a money-grub or not. Usually determined by their personality and character anyways, but always good to prevent the hole in the wallet in addition to the termination of the relationship (if and when it comes to that).

Uh...You seem to have fallen in love - beware, it's a trick of the brain. Don't let it cloud your judgement! :tpg:

Love leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to SUFFERING.

Better said:
Love leads to Fear. Fear leads to Anger. Anger leads to Hate. Hate leads to the Dark Side...and once in the Dark Side you can't see a crap! :tpg:

She sounds like some dumb American Eagle type girl who digs "surfer dudes". And if she's shallow that she doesn't like you "physically" and even has the guts to tell you in your face, just ditch her and move on.

Well, someone certainly sounds bitter.

About the girl Lufia2 (by the way, your name is retarded and so is your text) - go drinking and clubbing with her. See who she hangs out with, see if you like spending time with her. You've got nothing to lose~

Maybe you could make some changes. I mean, clothes are clothes, why not dress a little more trendy? Not like it's a huge deal. You can make some changes if it'll get you the girl, no big deal.
If not, don't get too bummed out. I guarantee you that whatever she has that you like? Someone else has and does better. No matter what happens, you ain't losin' much! \M/