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If you kids don't stop fighting, I'm going to stop this car and leave you here!
Some posh well-to-do mother in Scarsdale, NY actually did it.
Apparently, her two daughters (10 and 12) were fighting in the back seat. Mom pulled over the car and kicked the two out at a shopping center and left. What do you think of this? Did the mother do something awful, or did she just follow through on a threat? Should she be arrested? Was there truly any severe trauma done to the children through this incident in your opinion? |
Ha ha, I think the best bit was where she called the police to report the younger one missing.
It was probably a bit extreme to drive all the way home, I think chucking them out and driving round the block would have been enough to shut them up. |
Precisely, I don't see anything wrong with leaving them for a few minutes for the sake of a scare, but to go home without them and then call in the police to clean up your mess?
If you want the state to take care of your kids for you, lady, they've got programs for that. |
She chose the wrong threat to follow up on. Without any further information on the circumstances, I'll have to conclude that it would be a rather traumatic experience for a 10 year old.
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That's cool, parents leaving their children seem to be en vogue these days
German children abandoned in Italian pizzeria after parents go out to smoke |
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Also, might as well follow up on your threats if you are gonna hand them out. But I wouldn't have actually LEFT the kids, maybe shove them out, wait thirty seconds and then tell them to scramble back in before I ACTUALLY leave them. I'd say this falls in the traumatic child event graph between Losing Your Parent in Walmart and Seeing Your Parents Do It |
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Also, I'm a little surprised the 12 year-old left the 10 year-old. I'm an older sister and as a kid was pretty protective of my little sis. Doubt I'd have left her alone to go looking for mom. (No, I am not BLAMING the 12 year-old. Simply find it odd is all.) Quote:
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Like Midna said, siblings fight no matter WHAT their parents' social standings are. Kids fight with their siblings. This is life, Tande. |
Though I sound like a broken record I agree that it's a bit extreme to leave the kids out there and drive all the way back. That's crossing the line between temporarily appearing to be a bad parent in order to scare kids and actually being a bad parent and scaring your kids. Maybe if the girls were a bit older it wouldn't bug me so much but I'd be scared shitless if my parents just kicked me out of the car at some shopping center when I was 10.
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I dunno if I'd have been scared shitless, I'd probably have just started walking home. I used to walk a good mile and a half to school on my own at that age so it's not an insurmountable distance. I did grow up in a very friendly, middle class town with no crime though.
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And I know siblings fight, I had three brothers. But we never got to that extent to where my parents had to throw us out of the van. Obviously the mother isn't very stable. |
Parent tells child her face would freeze like that, child later found with severe burns
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Haha, my mum actually did this to me and my brother once, about 2 kilometres from our home when I was 12-13, and he was two years younger than me. We just walked home, and as far as I know we weren't traumatized (although this didn't happen in the city as we live in the middle of nowhere). Granted, 3 miles is quite the distance, but this isn't something that will scar you for life. If you want threats to be effective, now or in the future, you better follow through on them once in a while. The article is pretty shitty though, what is the relevance of noting that they live in a 2million dollar house?
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I want to give this parent a ^5
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Why point a finger at the children? Spoiled or not, their mother left them the fuck behind. Just having money doesn't necessarily make your kids spoiled, nor (clearly) does it make you any more capable of raising them.
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I automatically think of all the crap that could've happened to my kid if I did that and it freaks me the hell out.
BUT my son is not old enough to annoy me to the point that I would want to do something like this. So even though I'd love to be the first to cast a stone, I can't. In theory, I have no problem with this form of "punishment". Kids get away with way too much crap (I'm generalizing based on what I've seen) and there's no harm in freaking a kid out to prove a point as long as you don't do some really stupid crap like say, NEVER COME BACK! Where the lady missed the mark was just washing her hands of the whole thing. Some folks just shouldn't have kids. |
This is a threat that was actually followed through by my parents with my younger brother when he was 9 years old. We were driving to my community where my mom had grown up in, and my younger brother was being very mean and belligerent to our mom. So we were driving in the middle of nowhere, so my dad had stopped the car told my younger brother to get out and he actually drove away.
Not very far, mind you, just far away enough to have my younger brother run back to the vehicle as quickly as possible. My dad then asked him if he was going to behave, and he said he was going to behave. I do agree with Shin's statement Quote:
It doesn't matter whether or not your rich, or what kind of neighborhood you live it. Your still a parent and you have to do what you feel is best for the kids. I think with this lady, she kind of had the right idea but she went a little too far in terms of trying to prove her point. Thankfully nothing horrible happened to these little girls. |
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:monocle: |
When I was 12, my mother dragged me down to the local jail and had the cops toss me in the slammer for six hours just because I stole a few dollars from her purse. I thought it was a joke until the door slammed shut and everyone walked out. Shit scared me straight real quick.
I honestly think more parents should take these things into their own hands and dole out some frightening punishments for misbehavior. You don't have to damage the child, just shock them. Fuck the wimps who think they'll be traumatized for life and such things constitute mental abuse. I think most of the world's criminals and punks would be better people if someone in their lives had scared the ever-loving shit out of them early enough. Getting the cops involved was kind of stupid here, but otherwise this woman deserves a medal for following through on her threat. |
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I know I wouldn't fuck with a mom who wears a massive gold medallion around her neck that reads "I FOLLOW THROUGH ON MY THREATS." |
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Although her mother used a more proactive approach and put mouse traps in her purse. |
For all these anecdotes of "my parents were assholes, therefore I became an upright citizen", you'd think my dad's belt buckle would have guaranteed my entry into MIT
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Just think about how much more of a delinquent you would be otherwise.
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I guess I never killed anybody =D
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Going to echo Shin's post about just driving round the block. That should be enough to scare the shit out of them in a more controlled and safe way. Driving home and then getting the police involved was a douche of a move.
Personally I don't think it would have bothered me at that age. I've been told that when I was 3 in the supermarket with my mother she said "Come on, I'm leaving now" and I just looked at her, said "Bye bye" and wandered off. Apparently I did that kind of thing a lot. |
Parents dont know how to raise their kids no more, you need to be firm with kids from the start. Give them a slap or two sometimes doesnt matter.
Leaving young kids at a mall and leaving? thats retarded, it's because of stupid parents like her kids get kidnapped. |
This was both a lesson for the kids to shut up and to stop arguing. Two lessons in one, I think the punishment was only fair. I won't comment on the mother's parenting skills - she could either be a genius or some idiot who raised her kids very poorly until this final straw.
And the older kid failed pretty bad. I wouldn't have left my younger sister alone if we two somehow got separated from mom. I think it even happened a few times to us, actually. These sort of incidents bring out some realistic thinking from children very easily, to stop fighting and to start thinking how to get back home. Which is not what that girl who abandoned the little sister did. She might have already lost all her common sense forever. So she is very well spoiled. |
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Yeah that's right I'm calling you dumb what are you gonna do about it you big fat dumb guy huh huh huh nothing thats what i thought DUMBGALIN @ Krelian if your parents had such good jobs did they buy you birhtday presents every day of the year? ps happy birthday krelian |
I'm going to agree with Tande on the fact that any "emotional trauma" the kids have been left with from this incident should be totally fucking insignificant. They'll undoubtedly be put into counseling and spend years being told what an awful, wretched husk of a woman their mother is, though.
However, I'm not sure that the whole spoiled-rich-kid situation really applies here. During the nineties, my dad had a lucrative trading job, my mother was a high-strung socialite and we lived in a series of huge houses in Chicago's north shore suburbs. From about the age of six onwards, I walked to a state school a few blocks away every morning. My most exciting birthday presents were clothes and books. Television and games were a strictly weekend-only affair. If I broke something or cocked up my parents' social gatherings or suchlike, you'd better believe I was made well-aware of my errors. The point I'm trying to make (which, intentionally or not, seems to also be echoed in the article given how rife it is with references to the family's affluence) is that people can be well-off without overindulging their kids. What we've got here is tough love taken slightly too far. Opinions aside, though, this "news" item is just sensationalist tripe. I mean, look at the counterpoint presented by another local mother they interviewed: Quote:
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The Mum acted like a spoilt brat, ditching the kids somewhere where anyone could have taken off with them. It's a good thing a decent person found the 10 year old. (And yeah, it's weird the older girl just ditched her little sister like that.)
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A kidnapping would have done both of those little shits a world of good, let me tell you. They'd have news stories, book deals and posh condos in Hollywood while they waited for the script of their life adaptation to be approved by Jerry Bruckheimer to be made into a spring drama when they got older. Just sayin'. |
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And about the iPod lady: she sounds like the same kind of parent who would have one of those leash/harness set-ups for their toddler, walking around the mall letting it inspect the gum under the nearby bench while she ordered her starbucks Mocha choco frappa whatever drink. I don't know there are many good points on either side. What if the children had been hit by a drunk (or sober?) driver or kidnapped? Not too likely but then again not unlikely. |
When my parents got angry due to fighting and stuff in the car/van, they would usually kick me out... This one time on the way home, my mother was really angry at me and my sister, and I decided to get out of the van and walk the remainder 6 miles to home. My Mom took off, but my sister started crying a lot and told her to stop the van so I could get back in. My sister started to apologize a bunch, and kept crying. Point for me! :D lol That was a long time ago now that I think of it.
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Although my parents never left us, stopping the car, making us line up in front of the car (so ALL the passing cars can see what bad children we've been) and Dad bringing a clenched fist up to his face and audibly breathing on it was threat enough to set us both (my sister and I) straight.
And don't you judge my dad: knuckles to the skull FUCKING HURTS. And it's embarrassing enough as it is letting the whole world know you're getting a whooping. |
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