Living with Parents
 

Of course I mean after the age of 18 (or presumably when you are "of age").

I understand that there are some hardcore slackers in the world who live with there parents as there are people who are pampered by there parents even at grotesque ages, but regardless of how sad or pathetic the reason it never sounds good to say, "Yea, I live with my mom."

I will admit, I am moving back with my mother after living an incredibly long three months away from any family. This is not because I'm a slacker, although this could be argued, but my mother is having financial issues and with my ability to get a decent paying job I will be paying a part of the mortgage to her house until she figures out how to lower the payment. There is also a possibility that I'll be cosigning for the house as well, which means I'll be living with my mom in a house I partially own. Now that doesn't sound so bad, but my mom would still be the "bread winner".

Coming from a family where there is a long history of single mothers, living with my mom doesn't feel wrong at all. I've only come to realize that now, at age 22, it does sound really bad, especially if I'm trying to pick up women.

So my questions for you, my fellow GFFers are the following:

Are you living with the parents?
Are you a slacker or in a somewhat peculiar situation?
When did you leave the "nest"?
What's the first thing you think, without knowing the details, when somone says they live with their parents (and they normally "shouldn't" be)?

Of course you can interject your opinions where needed.

I left home when I went to college. Stayed away every summer except for the one of my freshman year where I worked full time as a chemist at a local company.

After graduating a semester early I was planning on living at home until I went off to graduate school nine months later. After two weeks I decided I couldn't stay there just because it was so hard to get back into living with my parents (we get along great, I call them and talk for at least an hour at least two-three times a week). I wound up working for a professor at the school I had graduated from for the winter, spring, and summer. Went back home for two weeks before starting grad school, and now I'm living out here 3000 miles away on my own.

Nice poll, this will draw the line between people who have prejudice and people who are tolerant. I myself don't have any problem with living with parents, because in Chinese culture it's more than normal.

My wife and I are living with her parents until I leave for Air Force training in January, but that's only because the cheapest we can find for apartments here is $600 a month, whereas we only have to pay $150 a piece here.

People live with their parents for a variety of reasons (for example financial); this doesn't make them "slackers". It's their life, and none of my business.

I've been living in a different country from my mother since I graduated from high school in 2006, and I have to admit that I do feel guilty about it, because she needs me, not physically, but emotionally. I'm fine with living on my own, although there are days when I miss Germany a lot, and I have etablished a life for myself here for now. That's what keeps me here, that and the fact that my mother and I need some distance to get along well. And still, I will go back to Germany after I get my Bachelor's degree here and move a lot closer to her, because I can't keep doing this to her. So my reason wouldn't be that I want her to do my washing, but that I'm worried about her and want to be there for her during the time she has left on this planet, and who knows how much that is?

I think we should be careful before judging people so quickly. I quite honestly admire people who live with a parent/their parents and take care of them (not so much if it's the other way around), because I know how difficult it can be. It's called making sacrifices, and is not very common in our culture anymore, since parents are viewed as having an obligation to love and give unconditionally, but never receive.

Note to Katchum: I have noticed that myself. There are definitely strong bonds between children and their parents. I find it admirable.

Anyway, to answer the questions:
-No.
-I could have left home when I first went to college but finicially I was MUCH better off paying some of the rent and food. In fact, by the time I graduated from my first college and went to my second, I owned nothing in terms of loans. For my second college, had i lived on campus, I would have had at least twice as much with regards to loans. So monetary reasons was why I stayed with my 'rents.
-Basically as soon as I graduated from college.
-I tend not to judge. There ARE good reasons why. Heck, when I and my wife finally go to the States, I'll be living with my 'rents again for a variety of reasons including that in which we will lower the amount of initial financial strain on us. I also know of others who live with their 'rents for other good reasons (i.e. loss of a job, financial problems, focus on studies (like graduate school), etc).

I actually have no problem with the idea. in fact, I think it's rather noble of parents to help their child out. Of course, I do feel that their children should help out in a variety of ways whether it be housework, helping pay the rent/food/etc., taking care of younger family members, or so forth.

Of course, I am a bit anxious when I have to move back in. I guess the idea of living by myself (and now with my wife), doing things my (or now our) way, etc. not being totally applicable because I will have to go under my 'rents rules makes me feel a bit uneasy. I did visit them for a month this past summer, and for the most part things went rather well. If anything, I felt I followed my 'rents rules MORE when I came for a visit then before I left. But I guess that's part of learning those lessons on your own, huh?

I've not lived with my parents for more than a month at a time since the age of eight. My mother no longer has a permanent base, and I have no clue where my father is, so I doubt I'll ever be living with them again.

I've lived at school nigh-on full time for ten years, and can't really imagine a different lifestyle, despite my situation not exactly being perfect. Life will be a shit ton more fun once I'm doing my own thing this time next year.

I don't have a 'cutoff age' at which I start to think something's amiss, but when I see someone who's finished school still living with their parents, my instinctive reaction is "...why" - I know, it's kind of prejudiced, and most of the time I won't know most of the details, but from my perspective, if they have the option of leaving their parents' home, it just seems... Somehow wrong. For lack of a better word (not trying to use it in a pejorative sense here; please take it literally) it seems retarded.

I'm 20, and still live with my parents, although only during break. (Great house too <3 ) Although I could always move out, it would just seem silly when they're my financial supporter for part of my living expenses as well as college (and those GREAT loans)

When I was younger, if I heard that someone older than twenty is living in their parent's house, I'd immediately get a mental image of a fat nerd eating junk food and living in the basement. Now, I'm not so judgmental, and it doesn't sound odd for people to live with their parents, even after they're married.

After college, I might get a place of my own, or live with my parents (paying rent and whatnot), depending on my financial status, I suppose.

Just graduated college, but am still living at home. I don't plan on staying long, because for 1, me and a bunch of guys are gonna find a place in NYC together, and 2, I simply don't want to. I love my parents, but I love independence more at this point of my life. College gave me a taste of freedom that I so desire.

I never really had a Real home, My Parents got divorced when I was really young (like 3) and then they left me with my cousin's Family. I pretty much been very independent since I was very young. I had to learn how to take care of myself, and understand the really obvious fact that IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA TO WAIT AROUND AND EXPECT THINGS TO HAPPEN FOR YOU, IF YOU WANT SOMETHING DONE, LEARN HOW TO HAVE TOUGH SKIN AND BE RESPONSIBLE AND YOU HAVE THE POWER TO TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR OWN LIFE AND FUTURE.

I lived with my mother and brother quite "long", I moved away when I was 20. But I wasn't some lazy bastard who wanted to get free meal and laundry service.
The whole time I was looking a job that could support me and my two cats without me begging cash from my parents. My family isn't rich, so I needed to be sure that when I move away, I don't need to loan money, because that wasn't an option. And because I'm too proud to ask help. :rolleyes:
So, I don't judge people who live at their parents' house after they've turned 18, but if you're, say 30 and still live like that... There's gotta be a damn good reason for that. :eye:

Like I said, people forget that sometimes, it's an inverse care relationship, with your parents needing YOU.

Recently I moved back in with my parents in their small as shit motel room (long story) due to the fact I'm broke/ my job pays shit (not to mention gas prices are too high to be commuting to and from work some extra 30 miles while my folk's place is a mere 3).

Cultural and financial stuff matter a lot in this area... for example, in some places it's quite ridiculous to expect someone to leave the house when the country/region/family 's economy doesn't allow such things. Or when the family bounds are so (traditionally) strong that is natural to have several generations under the same roof/neighborhood/etc.

On my case, I'll leave my parents house when the time comes for me to make a new family.

Yup, I live at home. I had actually moved out when I started college but then I got really sick and had to drop out and move back home during my treatment. I'm better now and steadily recovering but I'm still at home. I want to move out in the near future but the free food, easy money, mom doing a bunch of the chores and not to mention, access to the car - are making it a hard choice. I am only 20 so I got a year or so ahead of me before it starts to feel like a real problem.

Sadly, what I think of when someone says they live at home is "Hey, me too!"

I'll be finishing college within the next few months, and I know that I'll be living with my parents for a little while after that. I'm not talking forever, but I need to earn money for when I move to the NYC area, and moving out, paying those bills plus my student loans and such just wouldnt get me where I want to go. I'd say that within two years of graduating I'll be moving out.

Its really not a bad thing to be living with your parents for a while, if it helps with money troubles. Especially because of how high college tuitions are getting, its almost expected at this point.

Well I suppose it also has a lot to do with the parent-child relationship. Are the parents over bearing in their beliefs and drown the children in them? This would definitely drive me crazy and want to be free from that.

Luckily my mother and I see eye-to-eye on most things and I've never had many strict rules set before me. Sure as a young teenager I hated her guts for whatever juvenile reasons, but in retrospect I understand all of her actions and decisions. This and I can never hold anything against her, mostly because she is my mother and she worked hard for twenty years to give me as much of a life that wasn't ghetto as possible. I must say she did a splendid job!

I really don't want her to have to get a lame apartment or condo, her house is pretty great, and if I can help her keep it then I will. The house is almost a symbol of her "making it" as a successful person, even with all the circumstances that wouldn't have allowed it.

I lived with my folks through college and planned on doing so whilst offshore (to save cash), but they had to move almost right when I started work in Houston, and the new house is quite small.

I visit quite often though. My parents never spoiled us, but I have the utmost respect for my folks. I love visiting quite often, and my old man is a bottomless fountain of information on anything I'm interested in. So he's quite nice for advice on most things.

I got back onshore just yesterday morning, and the first place I went (after checking my apartment and the mail in Houston) was head home to visit them. When I was off last time, I'd visit every weekend, and my brother (probably my best buddy) would visit as well. We're a pretty darn close-knit family.

I probably won't live with them ever again, but in their later years, they probably will need financial support. If they need to move under my roof, I won't have a problem with that.

I'm 24 and I still live with my parents. That's not to say that I'm going to continue to live with them by the time I'm 30. I consider myself somewhat of a slacker if you're talking about laziness. But, I know what needs to be done, so I'm not completely avoiding any important tasks. I'm also job searching, so financially, I wouldn't be able to support myself at the moment. I hear about all these 19-year olds living out on their own and sometimes I feel inferior/embarrassed to say that I still live at home. It's kind of hard to be apathetic about it. Other times, I think about what family really means to me. It's about helping/supporting mom and dad and vice-versa. I'm also Korean and the only one fluent in English in my entire family, so I have to act as the translator for my parents. Ah well, at least I can enjoy mom's cooking.

Are you living with the parents? I do not live with my parents! I would HATE to do that again.

Are you a slacker or in a somewhat peculiar situation? I guess I'm a bit of a slacker. I'm a stay-at-home mom.

When did you leave the "nest"? Hm..I moved out of my mom's apartment when I was 18. We got into a fight, and she said, "If you don't like it, move out!" So, I did! I lived with my boyfriend until 2004, when I broke up with him and moved in with my dad's family...for 6 months. I've been living with my husband ever since.

What's the first thing you think, without knowing the details, when somone says they live with their parents (and they normally "shouldn't" be)? I think the person must be a geek or loser. Judgemental, I know, but 30 is kinda old to still be depending on mom or dad!

I don't currently live with my parents, although I do live with my older brother. I left my parents' home when I was 18 to attend college. My brother lived near campus, so it was convenient. I don't pay rent because no one thinks it's necessary. I simply help my brother out as needed by doing simple chores and cooking whenever I have time. I'm also in nursing school, so I don't have time to manage a part-time job. On that note, I don't consider myself a slacker. I'm rarely at home because I have to do a lot of patient or clinical work when I'm not in class.

I also don't find it too unusual if I hear that people my age live with their parents. They may have their own personal reasons for doing so. Someone I know lives with her parents and helps them pay their mortgage as well as other bills. I know not many people do that, but she has her reasons for helping her parents.

I've lived on both sides of the fence. Being a rebellious teenager, I wanted out-the-door as soon as I turned 18. And I got it. Landed my pretty little face straight into a steaming pile of shit and went bust after 18 months.

I moved home to lick my wounds and stayed there for years on end.

I did, however, manage to save my dollars and could consequently afford nicer things and pay for them. I put my money away and realized living by myself was not economically sane just for the title of "independent."

Now, I have a nice, fortified bank account and am moving out with someone. The ideal situation that I was waiting for.

I was never a slacker. I've never been unemployed for more than a week since I was 14 years old. I've always worked, I've always LOVED working, and I've never asked for handouts. I'm proud of this fact, and I am even more proud of the money I've saved through the years to afford what I want, when I want it.

I currently live with my parents but I hope to move out in a few months. However my financial situation is not as great thanks to my fucking car breaking down. So I'm basically trying to save while paying off some of the bills that I have. I hate living here, I need my own space.

My parents live a 12 minute drive from the college I go to. And they're really not that bad of people. Hence I'd have to be nuts to not take advantage of the cheap living for the duration of my Undergrad. I'll move out for Grad school, but I see no issue with staying at home until I'm 22.

Now, granted, if my GF didn't have an apartment and still lived with her parents, then there would be issues, but thankfully that's not the case.

I'd say I have one of the more harmonious arrangements living at home. I'm 19 and live with my father and sister. I haven't moved out yet because I attend college in the city, and especially in NYC it wouldn't make much financial sense to try and get a dorm. The three of us all work so it's not like we see too much of each other, and we got along just fine when we are together. We all split the bills for rent, internet, and electricity, so it's like living with roommates except they can boss me around because I'm the youngest member, sigh.

I do plan on moving in with a friend of mine but these are long-term plans that probably won't be realized until after we graduate college. I'm in no hurry anyway, since I won't have it this easy ever again, so I want to save up as much as possible. (and failing miserably at that)

I moved out when I was 18 years old. I was going to university for 5 years straight and would always spend the summer staying back home and working.

When I finished university there was period in which I was living with my parents for about a year and half but I decided to move out when I was 24 years old. I just felt like it had to be done. I felt like I had something to prove something and I wanted to establish my own independance. My mom absolutely did not want me to move out, she tried her hardest to make me stay; she even volunteered to help me pay off my student loans if it meant me staying at the house for a few more years because I tended to be the most reliable, responsible and trustworthy member of the family. As great as that sounded, I wanted to pay off that debt by myself. It felt more rewarding for me that way to take care of my own debts by myself. It was hard for the first few years with me and my fiance living together, we were barley keeping our heads above water.

I don't really hold it against people who continue to live with their parents because from my experiences a lot of people because at their current point in time their not financially stable. Obviously they need to save money to get an apartment or a house. If your helping out your parents with any financial situations or any personal problems.

The only thing I that aggravates me about people who live at home is if they live at home for the sake of only one thing and thats convienence. If someone is staying at home and they have the funds and they're in a position in their which they can make living on their own I don't see much point in staying home. Sure its great if you live at home and you don't have to look after very many bills and you get to see your parents every day.

Deep down people make their own choices in order to benefit themselves, I can't really hold them against that because its normal human nature to look after yourself first. My dad taught me a very important lesson before I had to leave to work away from anything and everything thats important to me. Life is not based upon conveience, if your not ready to sacrifice and put yourself through challenging times for the people and the things that are important to you then your not ready to make the most out of your life.

I will graduate in August of 2008 and I have been living without my parents for 3.5 years now. After graduation I have an awkward 6 months before matriculation to medical school and I will move back home during that time. I'm kinda nervous about it... my parents are pretty laid back, and I never was a wild kid. But I'm still concerned about those "rules" that come back, just because you're back under the same roof. Come home by ____. Well, why? I have been doing as I please and making it on my own since 2004. So I hope it all goes well. But I can't complain about the dinners, and spending time with family!

No I am married and live with my wife.

No I work hard for my money and make a decent living.

Two weeks after I turned 18 when I left for the Army

I generally don't care. There is nothing wrong with living with your parents as long as you are pulling your own weight. If they are just a leech it tends to show in other aspects of their personality/attitude. So I usually end up disliking them because they are lazy fat slops who do a shitty job at work, not because they live at home.

I live with my father and Im currently graduating from high school at 19 years old. Not too bad, hopefully i will have my own place by the time Im 25.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with living with your parents as long as it isn't some ridiculous age. I currently live in an apartment, but I know people who live with their mom or dad who are single and need help around the house. Also I know people who can't afford to have their own place. If I didn't have a roommate I wouldn't be living away from my parents right now. I could only afford a small apartment in a shit neighborhood by myself, and that is not something I would do right now with Philly setting record numbers in the crime department.

I still can't see anything wrong about living with your parents, as long as you don't behave like a kid and pull your own weight, that means pay rent, contribute to food costs, etc., cook, take care of things around the house, take care of your own stuff, and so forth.

As long as you're not a passive recipient, but also an active giver, I don't see a problem with it, although I do think you are missing out on some experiences of independence if you never move out.

But again, it depends on the situation your family is in (financially and otherwise), and once and for all, there may be situations where it is required for someone to take care of your parents (e.g. for health reasons), and in that case, I think it is a good thing if you move in with them. It's extremely hard to see your parents' health (physical and mental) deteriorate, and being unable to do a thing about it, and taking care of them day after day. It hurts, and it certainly has nothing to do with "being a slacker".

I just hate it when the parents always rush the kids out of the house right when they turn 18, like they did to my sister,so now she is living with her bf in an apartment struggling on tent.

Currently 24 and living at home.

Been in and out... Left originally at the age of 19 when I joined the military. Moved back in at 23 after finishing University.

Basically where I live, my income does not allow me to purchase a house, and I don't see the point in sinking $950 + utilities into a bachelor pad when I can just pay my parents some rent, at least then I know it's going to a better cause. Saving up for a house, but when a small condo goes for over $200k, you either gotta be making some good money, or have a nice nest egg. I just bought my new car with cash and have no debt, so I constantly put money into a savings account and $150 a week into bonds, with a little stock market playing on the side.

A group of friends will sometimes get on my case about me living at home, but it doesn't bother me. The Five of them live in a three bedroom townhouse that is not well cared for in an area I would not trust to park my car. They constantly ask me for money or if they can burrow my car, hence why I laugh when they try to downplay my living situation.

Am I a slacker? I don't think I have the right to say yes or no. I am supposedly within the top 5% for income in Canada, yet I could barely afford a small condo here. I lived with little spending money for 4 years on my own, and managed to walk away with my diploma's without debt, so when I buy a house, I want to enjoy it and make sure it's something I can be proud of. I don't want to find myself in heavy debt, living paycheck by paycheck. I want *it all* as some people put it, nice house and nice car, but I am willing to wait for it.

Edit: Apparently, the average age to move out in Ottawa is 27/28, so I am still in the norm.

I am 24 years old and I still live with my parents. No big deal in my opinion. I mean, if it's better for both sides, what's the problem. It's not so much the financial aspects (I save a lot of money, they save a lot of money), but also the ideological point of view. After I finish university, I gonna have to work and probably move somewhere else, but so far, I see no reason to leave.

Oh, and I do have a very good relation to my parents, so maybe that's the reason I don't even want to move somewhere else.

I spend most of the time at the university, which is like 15km away from my home, so I don't feel like I am abusing my parents

I'm 22. I could do two things really, find a secure job, move out, live from paycheque to paycheque. Down that route lies the crushing 9-5, living for the weekend, existential crises, and ultimately, Beachy Head. Or I can remain at home where I can put most of my money into savings, meaning I never feel anchored to a job and I feel like a free man. My mum is single so she enjoys me being around, and she benefits financially too.

It's a position which has bought me untold freedom, and opened up chance opportunities, such as being able to drop everything and go galavanting off to different parts of the world for weeks at a time several times a year. I also never want for money. My friend moved out of his mothers and he's suddenly become a very boring person, since it's impossible to get him to do anything. 'Bit strapped for cash mate'. Well I'm not, and I fucking love it.

It's a great myth that flying the nest grants you independence. No, see, by moving out you have to work longer and harder, so there's no loss of dependence at all, just a transfer of dependence from parent to employer. You dick!

Maybe independence isn't the right word, but yes, your dependence does get transferred, and this gives you experience. I'm not saying you can't have life experience if you live with your parents, but I, personally, am happy that I moved out, because I couldn't deal with the dependence my mum has on me anymore, and because I enjoy not being so dependent on her, either.

Since the poll mentioned the age 30, then I think it's kinda sad that someone would live at home with their parents. Personally, I think people need to experience the independence and freedom of living alone, I think it can really develop confidence. I don't look down on people who live with their parents at an older age, I just don't agree with it. I find living alone to be much better than at home, just for the fact I don't get the third degree about staying up late etc.

I think a lot of it simply depends on the relationship you've got with your parent(s). Do they depend on you, or do you depend on them? Is it mutual dependency? How heavy is this dependency? Do you get along well? Do you have similar values and expectations? Are you good at communicating? Are you very aloof and distant from one another, and does this result in you getting the space you need, or more conflicts? How much do your parents respect your "adulthood", and how much do you still respect them? ....

I moved out at 17 when I went to school. The first summer I came back, the following one I was mostly at school, then last summer I came back again. The problem is I'm taking this semester off and I *hate* living here. Hopefully I'll be back in a dorm next semester and then after that it's off to the city.

Oddly enough, I've never lived alone and haven't even had a room to myself since my brother was born. And yet my mother doesn't understand why I got in the habit of staying up well after everyone's in bed, or even why I just crash in the basement sometimes. If I couldn't have that tiny notion of privacy I'd probably go crazy.

I moved out late due to lack of a decent job. At first I tried saving money by living at home, but in order for that to work I had to commute a fair distance every day, and I wound up paying a fair amount of money in car repairs and gas so it wasn't worth it.

I got nothing against people who must live at home due to circumstances, but living at home just because you don't want to be a wage slave or some bs like that, dude, that's gay. But it's cool, you're not mature enough to fly the nest, okay.

I live in my parents basement and don't plan on leaving any time soon.

My brothers have started an online web design company (out of the basement as well) and as soon as I get my skills up to speed I'll actively join in development.

No reason to be ashamed of studying and working from home. My family gets along really well, so it works out quite nicely.

I think it depends on where you live. I lived with my parents until I finished college at 25, but this was in Southern California. Housing of any kind down here is unreasonable expensive and it's difficult if not impossible for most to live here, go to college and work enough to afford even minimal living expensive without a large funnel of money from parents. My parents and I decided if they were going to have to support me, might as well do it in the cheapest way possible.

I don't really see much of an issue living with your parents as long as you aren't being a lazy shit and you are actually working towards being able to support yourself.

If you're going to college, OK, I get living at home. Otherwise, if you're 30 and living with you're parents and their aren't any extenuating circumstances, that's just sad.

Wouldn't want him to feel like he's not an independent man, now.

21 right now. Planning on moving out soon.

I'm 27, and I still live with my parents.
Basically, I'm a slacker, but I do have a good, steady job; I make more than my parents, combined (hourly rate).

It does have its advantages. I'm able to save money, considering the COL in California/Bay Area, and spend money on other stuff(like put 20% into my retirement and 10% goes to my medical insurance), instead of living paycheck to paycheck. Of course, I give my parents rent money, but nothing close to what you have to pay for rent here.

I see moving out as paying more bills(the rent for the apartment), and since my parents allow me a lot of freedom, I see no reason to move out. And most of my friends still live with their parents, because it's easier on them (financially), even though they make a good or great salary.

I'm 23 and live with my parents, which seems to be the norm among most of the Asians (and even non-Asians)I know. I lived in the dorms and then an apartment while in college then moved back home. It's just cheaper, but I help out around the house as well as pay some of the bills, since I make it rain and all. The drawback is that I live about 1.5 hours from work, so the commute is a bitch; but I'll be starting the hunt for a closer place soon.

I am financially able to live on my own, but leaving home feels like I am abandoning my mother to a life where she has to work a full-time job on top of acting as the primary caretaker of my grandmother. Though independence is certainly appealing, I feel I cannot act otherwise until I fulfill those duties and responsibilities which I have as a son and a grandson.