How to Chug a Beer?
 

I've been practicing and am really not good at this. This question is directed ONLY at people who have done it and understand how it works: I don't care if you THINK you can, if you do it right, you know it, and only those who know can help me.

Now I'm able to belch on command, and is it the same basic concept as far as opening up the trachea? I feel like I can open my throat and pour it down, but it does not go, it stops right around my windpipe entrance and doesn't push down. Any advice?

PS - I'm practicing with water until I get good at this.

Hmm, I've personally never done it (so fuck your request for "experts," heh), but I know of two ways.

1. Punch a hole in the bottom of a beer can, and open the flip-top, allowing air to escape when you drink from the bottom hole.
2. Take a bendy straw, put it in the top of a beer bottle so the bent thing faces down, then drink the bottle upside down, so that air escapes out of the straw.

I think you're trying to find a biological answer to "how to drink liquids fast" though. I dunno, constantly swallow?

I'm not worried about the beer entering the mouth, it's the liquid going down the throat without swallowing, because you can only swallow so much at once. I know it's possible to open your throat and let it literally pour down like going down a tube, but I don't know what to feel for :(

I'll try that google search.

It's like chugging a soda, or any other liquid. Why do you even need to ask this question? It's like asking "how do you chew meat?"

It's pretty much rhythmic and balance of each chug.

You could have a million people tell you but you won't know until you practice and master it yourself.

Becareful when jugging from a bottle. If you do it worng the suction can build up to dangerous levels so leave some space so air can escape. Jugging like anything else takes practise. You'll get there! : 3

No, it's not at all. There is a way to open your throat and have it act like a drain. If you have no idea what I'm alluding to here, then you obvious have nothing to contribute to the topic. It's a fair question, and I'm sure someone here has had experience with downing 12-16oz of beer in 1-2 seconds without gulping.

(This was directed at galen)

I do it with my eyes closed trying not to vomit.

Beer sucks, hard alcohol is the only thing for me.

I don't think people who chug beer do so in one motion. It's more like GULP GULP GULP GULP GULP GULP GULP AHHHHHHHH.

It's also always easier to chug stuff that isn't ice cold, in my opinion. Let it sit for a couple minutes

Think of the old man from the Man Show: he doesn't gulp. Granted, he's obvious had years of practice and a couple liver transplants, but is there something I'm not realizing in doing this or just need to convince my throat not to chicken out on me?

You're thinking about it too hard that's your problem!

The trick is to try to breath in your throat at the same... I know it sounds bad but try swallowing immediately after you breath...

Basically, swallow before and during drinking and you'll be able to take it much quicker. My personal record for a can (without shotgunning) is 2 seconds and a beer bong is 1 second.

Also, all I can say is practice makes perfect... I mean granted my liver probably doesn't work very well anymore...

Just practice swallowing hard and alot more (as bad as that sounds)...

No really... I think I'm an alcoholic (following is on aim... b/t me and a friend -- names have been changed for safety's sake):
friend: scotty said something very true today...
me: ?
friend: were townies..
me: lol
me: we are
friend: we play harder and longer and we expect much much more
friend: college kids r pussies compared to us
friend: bu then again their livers r probaly in much better shape
friend: yeahbut fuck it
friend: i never liked my liver very much anyways

Yea...... that's the story of my life right there...

He just has subtle, nuanced gulpage, from the years of practice.

I do overthink, but I am not exaggerating in saying I went thrtough 80oz of water in a very short time.

If you've bonged in 1 second, then that's what I'm looking for. It's like the pour directly into the stomach "idea" is merely a throat that can take ALL of the beer? I get that, and one big fluid gulp can take it.

I guess I do have the right idea, just need to stop sucking :( Thanks for the quick replies.

Sucking doesn't work at all, because it contracts the muscles and doesn't allow for free beer flowage...

That beer bong must have been tiny if you can finish it in a second flat.

The free flowing is what I hope to achieve. The man show guy sure can do an outstanding job of downing a lot, so I don't think it's unrealistic :)

:edgarrock:

Just put your head back, open your throat, and pour that golden goodness straight into your stomach!

Okay. So a much more important question is this: Why do you want to do this so badly?

Of course, he's only talking about one beer, right? One beer is gonna down fast.

I know I can down a beer bong pretty quickly, 3 beers in about 5 gulps, but alot of my friends can't do it. I am not really sure how you'd open your throat, because I can do it, but there is no specific way I do it.

I didn't realize the post expressed such desperation to make it seem like I want this "badly", but so be it... for fun. People ask me why I would ever jump out of a plane and that's the same responses: I live life for experiences, and I'm going to do it.

I can take 2 beers in about 2 gulps... I mean granted I'm a big guy (not fat just big)... but I've just kinda developed the talent.

Your liver pays dearly now for youthful magic moments, but rock on completely with some brand new components.

F my liver... it's a whiney little bitch that is always crying... F her... F her good...

Are you retarded? Why would you even think of doing soemthing like this.

Join a frat. You'll definately learn by trial and error. Or you can get hammered and then try chugging. You'll probably spill half of it and pass out. Then you can brag how you passed out during that party and how awesome it was.

God you people are ignorant sometimes.

Some people (And not everyone mind) are able to literally open up their throat and pour liquid straight into their stomachs. There's no swallowing or gulping involved. Two of my mates can do it and I've seen one of them drink a pint of Guiness in under 2 seconds.

It's a party trick as much as anything else and don't try it with lager because you'll probably throw up.

Also, if you're biologically incapable of doing it, there's no way of teaching yourself how, I'm afraid. It's similar to being able to burp on command but subtley different. So yeah, either you can do it or you can't and if you've been trying and failed then you probably can't, sorry dude.

Well my whole argument against you Shin, is that I originally couldn't do it because I didn't know HOW. Once I learned how, I realized I was able to do it. Just because you know how to do something doesn't mean you can do it. I mean I know how to run a mile in under 4 minutes, but I can barely break 5... so ya, some people just aren't able to do it, yes. But some people just haven't figured out they could because they didn't know how.

Oh yes, I win again :D.

Because I'm a bored, lonely old man looking for some kicks in life. Seriously, what the fuck kind of question is that and what would you expect as a response? Get out of my thread.

I've always been under the impression that a beer bong is made for the sole purpose to guzzle more then one beer in a short amount of time. My roomie's beer bong is made to hold 64 oz of beer and pretty much all beer bong's i have seen are similar.

If your using a beer bong for what it's meant and to it's maximum capacity, it is impossible to finish a beer bong in a second flat. Espically if the beer bong has a close/open valve on it.

Anyways, it is stupid to chug beer that quickly anyways, unless you plan to regulate yourself to piss water ( commerical brews ala Budweiser, Coors) the rest of your life. I would smack someone silly if i saw them beer bonging something like Dead guy ale or Guinness.

Guinness is too precious to bong, it MUST be enjoyed!

The biggest bong I've ever partaked in - was one that we set up on the staircase in our townhose - twenty feet of beer! (Close to three pitchers when full). I was never brave enough to attempt the entire staircase - but one of my friends was - he took it all in, and then threw a couple mouthfuls back up - because he said that the beer stopped flowing, and had filled his stomach, and most of his throat (causing him to throwup).

It was one of the greatest things I've ever witnessed, and Im definatly going to try at least 3/4 of the twenty-footer again!

And now I have a goal in life...

Then again that would explain why I am not in school this semester and owe 1327 in fees... just a heads up for yall who think drinking is awesome... well it is... but the reprecussions are really not worth it.

Gotta manage it right: I don't drink often at all. Last time I had anything was over a month ago. However, I think that this would still be a fun party trick to learn, and thus I'm gonna give it a try. The money isn't a problem, since it's not a frequent thing for me anyway.

Yeah, boozing is expensive when you drink a 2-4/night.

Er.. What? Speak English, boy.

So you're saying that now you can do it? I thought the whole point of the thread was you asking how to do it?

Your whole point about just because you know how doesn't mean you can do something is exactly what I just said, idiot. Being able to pour liquid down your throat is a genetic thing and nothing at all to do with "Knowing how".

And as for the rest of you, if you're someone who can open their gullet, you don't need beer bongs or any shit like that, you just pour it down your throat, out of a pint glass usually.

It's not such a difficult concept to grasp really.

I made the topic, and no, I can not do it yet. I didn't know what you said was true until you said it.