Very tricky situation. Need some clever ideas
 

I've asked a few friends and none of them gave worthwhile ideas. Here is the situation:

There was some girl I knew(but not that well) when I was about 13(who I liked a lot back then) that I saw again recently. She still looks great, but when I saw her I nodded and she nodded back, but it wasn't much. I think she remembered me slightly. I'd like to go out with her sometime, but I really don't have an "in" to ask her without completely blowing my chances.

I have no real way of hanging out with her and getting to know her more, considering we aren't even friends(and weren't really friends before), and also I don't know anyone she knows to kinda bridge the gap between us. I don't know her daily routines, so I can't keep running into her to the point where eventually I could strike up a conversation. Also I can't just ask her out next time I see her, because I'll get rejected. I need to get to know her first.

Very tricky situation and looking for some ideas. Never been in a situation this tricky before. Most girls I like I usually have an "in" with them. This one I have no in.

Well, I think that that point it's worth catching up, and using that you your advantage.

"It's been what, X years since we met, long ago? What have you been up to?"

Let the conversation roll from there. The hardest part is always the conversation topic, and you have that. But really, I'd say take it slow, meet her, greet her, and then get "in." Or at least an acquiescence.

See, you're halfway in because you have something to talk about. Let her do the talking first, though. You know girls. ;)

There is no easy way around this. If you want to get something going you're going to have to suck it up and start something. I know that's not the best answer and probably the last answer in the world you were looking for, but it's true.

Don't ask her out when you talk to her. Just see if you can hold a conversation for longer than 5 minutes, then pretend you're in a rush to go somewhere and ask for her number stating that you would to continue the conversation later.

The hard part about that is I'm going to have to run into her luckily again. It was the first time I saw her in a long time. I may never see her again. So if I do I need to make it right.

Which is exactly why I think you should give it all you got. It's not so much about doing "right", there is no right or wrong at such an early stage. The most important thing right now is to establish contact with her - then work from there. Be outgoing, listen to her, just like Sceptre X said - just get the ball rolling.

I definitely agree with Divest too - don't ask her out at once, rather look for a reason to stay in touch.

So wait, are you looking for clever ways to find her again and run into her, or are you looking for clever ways to strike up a conversation and get in her pants?

Because if it's the first one then... well. :/

The latter. I was leaning toward what you guys were suggesting, but the only problem is we weren't really great friends even back in the day in the first place. So it isn't like we are catching up. We barely talked. She was a friend of an old friend that I used to hang out with. Sometimes she was present when we hung out, but we barely talked at all. That friend moved away, and I never talked to her again. I saw her occasionally, but never said anything as the years passed(up until I was about 16) and she got really pretty, and matured a lot(body-wise).

To be honest, when I nodded and said hello, she may have not even recognized me and possibly just nodded to be friendly. So if she doesn't remember me, and even if she does, we weren't really friends in the first place, I can't really just start talking to her. It would be the exact same thing of me talking to a total stranger basically.

I'm still considering it, but I need to find a way to get close without seeming stalkerish. I don't even remember her name to be honest.

You can't be afraid to chat up a total stranger.

Not afraid of her, but some girls aren't into it. I've tried to chat up strangers before that weren't into it. The only thing is, I really find this girl attractive and have liked her for a really long time. Also she's a lot younger than me(like 3 years) and maybe 4. I really don't want to blow this opportunity.

First I need to find out if she's into the small-talk chatty stuff. Some minor stalking on myspace might be required as a prerequisite. Of course I need to find out her name first.

I consider it like a dating scouting report.

Of course you have an 'in'. You used to sort of know her, so ask her what she's been up to.

If that's the case then why not just go for it, what's the worst that could happen?

I would forgo the chatting up ad just go for casual chatting, and make sure you put yourself across strongly enough that she will want to chat to you again.

Find out her name, dude.

But then instead of taking it the "I know you, how's it been?" to the "Hey, don't I remember you from somewhere, whatcha been up to?" there are so many ways to start a conversation, and just go with it. The one thing I learn from work is how to talk to random people about random things, except that this girl ain't random...she's hot. (pussy on the pedestal, anyone?)

But you need to start up something to you CAN be friends, then you CAN go out with her. Random dude? Not so cool. Month long friend I chat to on MSN? Sweet.

You would need her full name and even then, the chances you'll find her on MySpace are slim. If you know any friends of hers that still talk to her and you have their MySpace page, see if you can find it through there, maybe?

Going to try to find her myspace so I can see what she's up to and more about her. I'll try that first. Don't know anyone currently who knows her. I'll have to find another way of finding it.

I dread to think about how people lived without the internet.

haha you're situation is cute. I wish you luck with her!

I've thought about it many times. But I'll never hesitate to use it to my advantage. :cool:

This honestly could be the first time in my life that I could be with a girl that I have a strong attraction to. I've never experienced before because I was never all that attracted to anyone I was with before.

How do you know that? The better you know a girl, the more likely you're "just a friend" to her. Establish your intentions early, or you're extremely likely to be rejected.

Well if anyone cares anymore, I ran into(sorta) this girl again today for the first time since I started this topic. It wasn't the same place as before, but I saw her around walking somewhere as I was driving down a local street.

I'm starting to lose patience. She has like the perfect face for me, but my chances of running into her where I can strike up a convo are just extremely thin. I rarely see her, and when I do it is in a way where I can't talk to her without seeming like a total nut. Like today to talk to her, I'd have to to a U turn to the other side of the street, slam the breaks pull over and jump out of the car.

I was hoping that I'd just bump into her on the street or in a store, but the chances are slim at this point. I probably won't run into her again at all for a while. It has been a month since the last time, and could be longer for the next.

So I'm thinking at this point desperate times call for desperate measures. Maybe operation Jason Bourne(stealth-stalk) is in order. Not the hardcore stalk, but to find out where she lives so I can plan something at least. I couldn't find her anywhere online so that is out.

Yes, I am that desperate btw. At my current age, I'm looking for someone I could potentially start a life with, and this girl has the perfect face for me, so that is a start. Of course she could be a total psycho, but I'll never find out if I don't talk to her, and to do that I have to snatch her up.

you shan't smell her hair. Try to be with her and talk to her so you guys can have a notebook.

I'm curious. What exactly are you recommending, here.

Maybe it has something to do with finding her shit clitoris.

I found her on myspace a week or so ago. It didn't really give me any ammo to talk to her. It has like no info about her, but strangely she logs in every day.

I'm gonna friend her and see what develops.

So what's the update?

Maybe she has Facebook? She might just log on Myspace just to check messages :O

It's great how this has evolved from a chance encounter to creepy stalking. Maybe you should start checking her mail and sleeping with her friends.

A-B-O-R-T!

You are counting your chickens before your eggs are even produced.

You are trying to use myspace for a girl who you didn't know that well, are trying to befriend because you want to date her, not because you want to be friends with her...and you're fucking using MYSPACE!

If you two weren't super good friends back in the day, she might chat with you on myspace to say hi but you are basically trying to break a rock with a glass hammer. Using myspace to get a "date" isn't the greatest choice BECAUSE, unless you actually hung out with her for real, you will NOT get a feel for the person.

If its rare that you'll be able to strike up a convo, and its rare you'll see her again...you don't have much of a chance. The most you could get is a phone number.

Hello Restraining order

Here you sound like a very shallow bastard. A agree that physical attraction is a must in all relationships but seriously...

I wish you luck but if you said its rare that you see her and that you were never friends with her to begin with...then it'll be rare if you can actually get together with her.

I would say just move on/move out of the city. Honestly, girls sometimes are like guys, they're a dime a dozen you just have to get out there and look.


But seriously...stay away from Myspace to get a date unless you know the girl personally

I advise moving on. MySpace is not the way to make/further good relationships. Seriously, if I were her, I'd be a bit confused that this guy I saw four years ago suddenly added me as a friend.

Moreso, thoughts ocme to mind. You barely know her, her interests, her goals, etc. How are you sure this will coincide with your own? You don't need to share the same interests in everything, but a relationship with no common interests is looking for diaster, frustration, boredom and general unhappiness.

Moreso, ask yourself this question (since you mentioned both looks and wanting to settle down)...what will it be like in thirty to forty years when she has aged? What will you have then that will make you (and presumably her) happy?

Sorry for the lack of updates fellas. Been kinda busy lately.

Anyway, the update is I gave up, and then shortly after I gave up I found out she had a boyfriend so it wouldn't have worked anyway.

I was really attracted to her, and only used myspace for monitoring, but I realized it just wasn't going to happen. I found out I know someone she knows and talked to them about her and she very much isn't my type anyway.

So that is the end of that. I've moved on for a while now so she's long gone in the rearview mirror.