Kurado has to choose
 

Just random. I'm interested in the answers and why. I am entirely not in the condition to choose and answer right now. Don't get silly with the options (you can never lose the phoenix! Don't worry about stupid technicalities!), just straight forward.

Fame and money. I don't really want to live past 75 anyway, what's 20 less years going to hurt so long as I make the most of them?

A heavenly garuntee? And in great health? I voted for that, simply because that means I could get all the money and fame I wanted. With no fear of death or illness there's a great deal you can do, risks you can take.

I'm not talking about robbing a bank. Just find some crazy motherfucker and bet him you can jump off the Eiffel Tower and live. There's the money, and with that kind of cash you can easily hire whatever kind of support you'd need to become a famous motherfucker overnight. And if there IS a Pheonix out there, you could buy it. Languages? Please, you could learn seven in a year if you devoted that time to it.

All you'd have to do is not get thrown in jail for your entire life.

Win.

A mastery of 7 languages is a mastery over language, not a mastery over ideas and philosophy that are substantiated by those words. Its like having a bike without wheels. What else is there?...

Who the hell is Fawkes? At any rate, I am assuming everyone is familiar with the tale of the Monkey's Paw? Yea. I'll pass...

100 years of age? This might be a given. If life expectancy continues to rise, there should be no reason why we all can't live to be damn near a hundred. In that context, perhaps the wish would best be spent elsewhere...

Money and fame...Perhaps there is a reason why Paris Hilton feels so content with her meaningless fame, but I could care less.

Ten Million bucks? SOLD!

An immortal pet who produces a cure-all for any wounds and diseases? I'm in. With something like that you could easily reach beyond age 100 in perfect health barring any horrible accidents. It shouldn't be too difficult to live a nice life without risking disembowelment though. Not to mention the heavenly decree only guarantees good health at the time you reach 100. That doesn't mean you won't have a pain-filled existance before slowly recovering.

Besides, an intelligent bird would be pretty handy for fetching things around the house.

Not even gonna lie, I'm a money man. There is almost nothing money can't buy.

I chose the mastery of 7 languages. That would be so awesome, knowing the most used languages in the world. The ones I'd choose would include Japanese, Italian, French, German...and a few that I forget as of this moment. I'd be such an impressive thing to say, too: "I know 7 languages" sounds more impressive to me than "I have 10 million dollars", although I guess that varies from person to person.

By the way, the money would be second for me. The fame would be last; I'd hate to be famous, since I hate being the centre of attention.

$10 million. No answers given.

But, for the fame thing....I'd only have 12-17 years left....so--no.

Where's the option for being a card-carrying member of NAMBLA?

Heavenly guarentee. Dangerous jobs aren't so dangerous(and pay quite well) when I know I'll be in perfect health. Plus we're notorious for dying early in my family so a bit of insurance against that would be nice.

I'd choose the 100 years of age and good health.

Money is cheap, fame is worthless, languages can be mastered with time, and mythical creatures are likely to get stolen. Good health and a long life (guaranteed) on the other hand is priceless.

The seven languages thing seems like the least amount of benefit, but with no strings attached. Saves me a lot of time and effort on it, too. All these other options, I can see too many ways they can bite you on the ass.

Owning a phoenix would be cool, but I'd have to feed the thing. Kind of more responsibility than I want to deal with right now. Don't see many strings on this one either, but honestly, what would I do with a phoenix? Open an exotic zoo?

The problem with a guarantee that I'll live to be 100 is that I'll probably then keel over dead the day after my 100th birthday. My plan is to hold out until medical science can make me clinically immortal, via cures for deadly diseases, organ cloning, and good old cybernetics. 100 is shooting low for me.

Much as I'd like to flame out in a blaze of glory like John Candy, I think I'd rather keep it simple. I don't think I even WANT fame. And again, 50 is much too young to die.

$10 million, no questions asked? That's the classic evil genie schtick right there. Of COURSE that $10 million was stolen from the federal government, or from wrathful drug lords, or from a children's charity or something. No sir, not touching that.

Money is worthless without health. I think the language option sounds pretty good, but I guess I would go with the third option, although it's not that unusual to become 100 nowadays.

Well, 'in great health', as opposed to 'as drooling cluster of lame', is the important factor there.

Hey, you quoted one of my posts there http://i.somethingawful.com/forumsys.../emot-toot.gif

I guess that's true, but it's pretty much part of common sense that nowadays newborns - provided they don't fuck up their life by drinking too much alcohol or becoming drug addicts - CAN become 100 in great health. It's not like everyone over 80 is automatically chairbound, you know.

I'll take the outrageous amounts of money please. Life turns pretty shit after 60, who'd want to live to 100? Pet birds are pretty gay and $10 million dollars would be ok I guess but that's only enough for a nice flat in London these days. As for languages, if I had tons of money I could hire interpreters.

The ten mill. With ten million I don't have to work ever again, and I can travel where ever I want. The important thing is not to think you have to live like a millionaire as soon as you become one, then 10 million is more than enough to live free for the rest of your life. I wouldn't want to live to a hundred, but I think there'd still be a couple of years enjoyment after the 55 mark, roaming around on a yacht or something. I wouldn't want to give those up.

What's left? Dunno what that Phoenix thing is.

The 7 languages just doesn't sound special enough to me. You could learn those in a lifetime anyway. You've got 10 million, you're not working ever again, what else are you gonna do. If it was 7 million languages, and I could be like C-3P0? Well that'd be more like it.

Insane amount of fame and money, please. Knowing when you die can be a great asset. Gives you time to prepare for it and live life to the fullest.

I'm taking the ten million dollars. With that much money, I could probably buy master guides to various languages, make my own fame, and be able to be treated for the worst conditions by the best people with the best tools. I'd probably still have plenty left over, too.

I'll go with the Ten Million as well. I'll take my chances with reality. Throw 5 million of it into investments, that's more than enough to live off the interest comfortably for my entire life without working a day, and use the other 5 million to just get myself established (get a house, car, pay off grad school, etc.)

I plan to be dead by 30, so that second to last option seems boss.

I'd've picked the last one - but youd have to ask if you'd be trading your soul for that, so nevermind.

I would go with the outrageous amounts of fame and money.

I then take all of the money, and live a boring life until I lose all of my fame. Which, considering the attention span of America, should be about 6 months.
I then do whatever I want in obscurity.
(This assumes that "outrageous" means greater than 10 million dollars, however.)

Fame and Money. Witht he ADDED BONUS of dying in my fifties everyone will be all "oh remember RABICLE? He was so cool, why'd he ahve to die so young?"
"Yeah I liked his portrayal of Ben Skywalker in Star War VII and VIII"
And I'd be a legend forever.

I would choose the hundred years of great health. Like Fresh Frank wrote, this would give me the kind of confidence needed to achieve pretty much anything I want. And I could be high on nine different drugs every day without losing my mind. Unprotected sex all over the place, and so forth.

What does it mean that it's a "heavenly decree", though? Because knowing that there is a god, heaven, afterlife, and all that would be cool, too. I could even prove it to other people by performing death-defying stunts. Although that would only prove my invincibility, and not its heavenly origin, now that I think of it.

I'd take the money since I could then fun a lot of my own work without having to grovel to all of the different corporations out there. Would also be nice to retain patent rights on anything I develop.

I picked the languages. Dude, do you know how much cash I'll rake in as a translator? Plus I'm not gay. Lucrative government contracts here I come!

The phoenix. I could travel wherever I wanted and always have a companion, not to mention the healing effects of phoenix tears and the ability to start a campfire wherever I pleased. Hell, maybe I could sell the phoenix tears and offer transportation services to people for an extortionate price.

Languages I can learn if I wish. Even in good health, 100 is not an age I hope to see. I would have chosen the fame and fortune (+early death) but I abhor the idea of being famous; I would rather not be hounded by the press and manic fans for the remaining years of my life. I was sorely tempted by the money, but where's the fun in that? I'd get bored.

10 mil. Why?

So I can finally help out people.

KURADO HAS CHOSEN...

...ten million dollars. With that money and my copy of a Death Note, I'd be able to not only fund a harem of mudkips and other assorted Pokemon, but live as a God for well past my prime. But for now I'd probably just buy a house, a car, and a mail-order bride.

http://content.answers.com/main/cont...ain_Falcon.jpg
YES.

10 million dollars no questions ?
Invest 5 million, spend only the interest throughout rest of life.

The rest...
1 million will be spent on big breasted sluts and hookers.
1 million on food.
1 million on drink.
1 million on travel.
1 million given to charity of some sort (gotta get into heaven somehow 0:o

I'd rather spend the time learning seven languages rather than be blessed with instant mastery.

As cool as Fawkes is, I'm not much of a bird person. And the people who have passed have passed for a reason (or so they tell me) so why attempt to disturb them?

Living to a healthy 100 means you get to live and watch as all of your friends and family die around you. Right. Sounds like a blast. I'll pass. WAAAAAY too long a time to live, anyway.

The outrageous amount of money with guaranteed death between 50 and 55 is ideal except for the "fame" part. That's just an unnecessary hassle.


Which leaves the $10 million, no questions asked.

I'd never be able to blow through all that cash being as though my wants are relatively modest (for the most part), so I could travel and - believe it or not - go back to school just for the hell of it.

10 mil, no doubt. Spend it all in making a company or something that prints money so I get even more filthy and more rich.

7 Languages is nice, but with 10 million I'm pretty sure I can get some pretty good tutors.

A magical bird is great and all but I'm thinking sooner or later someone with the bird will get stuck between in a situation where only money can dig them out, lets barter.

Living to 100, nah, on one hand, thats way too long and while I may be in great health and all, but there was nothing said about wrinkles and the like, I don't want to be an old prune. On the other hand, if my company takes off maybe I can have them find some way to artifically prolong my life, pills or something of that sort.

Money and fame, I don't like fame, never really like the spotlight.

A few explanations. I'd forgotten I even made this last night.

Fawkes the Phoenix. You can thank Wikipedia for the info although IT MAY BE INACCURATE.
Plus the fucker can just teleport to you! Fawkes version of the phoenix, anyway. He can also carry your ass around in flight.
The Heavenly guarantee originally (of course no one could have known this but the poll options don't allow a lot of space and I was slightly off when I made it) meant that you wouldn't die from a random freak accident, you wouldn't get knocked out by something like a heart attack, a disease like cancer, etc. So the guarantee covers the shit that's basically out of our control for the most part. What you do with your end of the deal is solely up to you.

But some of you have turned it into some sort of temporary immortality with the stunts (sexual and physical) you'd take.! And I kinda like that =o! So you can decide either way.
Though fame and seemingly unlimited money is the last choice I'd take of the five, this is the best way to pull it off. And fame, even when you're dead, at least makes you an immortal through sheer memories and the fact that your name will never die.

The languages option is pretty straight forward. I mean, how many of us here can claim PERFECT English in all areas of language? Can you imagine how long it would take you to reach your English level of language for seven others?

The money option has no trapdoors. Just what it is.

Although having a loyal, intelligent, magical creature friend at my side all my life would be cool, I'd have to go with the 100 year guarantee. I want to experience as much as I can before I die and I think I'd be able to handle my end of the deal. Once the 100 year mark is reached you'd still be in great health, but you'd have to take complete responsibility from that point on. Now, if you're motherfucking IMMORTAL until age 100, then this is the best choice by far.

I'd take the 10 million. It's crazy how much stuff I'd like to do, and how much that would help me. I'd pay off my student loans, possibly consider grad school, because I'd actually have the money. I'd buy my parents a nice house, and get them (and the rest of our family) out of the shithole we live in now. I'd get a nice place to live in the nice part of NYC, and still would find the job I want in publishing, because sitting around all the time would just get boring. I'd organize so much... and probably give a lot of it to charity, because lets face it, 10 million is a lot of money, and I'm pretty sure I'd never be able to spend it all. Celebrities that complain they cant live off their salaries of so many million a year are pricks.

I personally feel that the heavenly garauntee is the best option here.

It doesn't rule out the fact you can't be rich or famous, it doesn't state you wont get ten million dollars, it doesn't mean you won't have a phenoix.. HAHA.. It just says you will live to be a 100 years old in great health.. LMAO.. You could do all the other things or at least persue them with absolute health and with no fear of dieing.. So think of all the other things you could do to get those things!!

Seems like a trick question to me.. And I think I answered it correctly! Or at least I think I did..

*thinks* ten million dollars.. Or a 100 years on earth.. Hmm... I am going to pull a Homer Simpson and say... "I'll try them both out, and call you in the morning.." =(8u(l) <-- Homer Look at it sideways.

Number four for me by FAR.

No contest there. I've already considered ending my life at 40 by way of over-dosing, so to be able to guarantee the things I already desire AND live an extra ten years than I had anticipated... wow, that's just a no-brainer for me.

And Temari... ten million dollars isn't THAT much money. You wouldn't be able to live off of it for the rest of your life let alone support anyone else. You'd be surprised how quickly money goes. Especially when it's a large amount like that. People start spending carelessly.

Charity. Hah. What a joke. Not you, I mean charity. I don't trust charities for shit. I'm always too suspicious that whoever is in charge is hoarding the lot of the money.

I'd take the money so I could go to school for whatever I want and become something I love that makes no money, rather than something I don't love that makes a sufficient amount of money. Plus... I've always wanted to live off interest.

Not to be greedy, but I would have to choose the 10 mill. It seems like everyone close to me is going through financial hardships (myself included, although not terribly bad) and it sucks seeing everyone struggle. Heck, I'd even be satisfied with 10 thousand.

I would pick mastering seven languages.

Culture fascinates me and learning the language of a particular culture allows you to understand more and learn more from that culture. Language ties itself into the culture that is created. Somethings can only be understood through knowing the language itself. Names do not have the same meaning if translated into another language. Mastering the language helps you see a bigger picture of the human world, its history, and its future.

I would pick the languages.
Imagine how many historical books you'd be able to read.
It'd be like a gateway into learning about history. Personally, I LOVE history. It'd also be great to be able to converse with almost anyone with ease. You'd definitely have lot of friends. (And probably enemies)

Language. Communication is important, and through communication you can learn about culture and philosophy and all that jazz.

But all things considered you can learn the languages the old-fashioned way. It's a bit harder to guarantee you're going to live to 100, have a magical bird, or get 10 million dollars.

I picked to live to be 100 in good health, I would not be able to enjoy money if I wasn't healthy.

I chose 100 years of great health. Why? I'm good at picking up languages, have a great education, and all that good stuff. The future already looks good for me in the monetary aspect. I have an ear for language, so I could pick them up given the environment.

So I'm picking the best of the "unattainables" (in my opinion). Living to your mid-fifties and being rich/etc is all fine and dandy, but given 100 years, you could pull the same off and relish it for even longer, plus live to see your family blossom outward (hopefully).

Hmm, so the 100 years thing is in a draw with the seven languages... And the straight up money is the winner by far. Didn't really expect that.