Another point to consider: If your partner cheats on you, doesn't that imply that your partner feels that you have failed to meet his/her sexual needs?

Yes, but instead of communicating that point, you run off and sleep with someone else. I think a relationship based around that philosophy is doomed in the long run. Some people can live with a cheater, I just don't think anyone deserves to. It's like staying with an abusive partner except they're abusing you mentally. Of course it might not be considered abuse if you're not bothered by it, in which case is it even cheating? :p

I can't tell you why men cheat, but I don't believe that women cheat because they are sexually unfulfilled. I believe that women cheat when they feel ignored or emotionally unfulfilled. And yes, I do think that there is probably something wrong in a relationship where a person cheats. But since there's no such thing as a perfect relationship, that idea is a little bit scary.

I know you weren't directing this question to me only, but I wanted to answer it because this is a subject that interests me. I believe that the FEELING of love is temporary. That feeling you get when you want to be with someone all the time, nothing they do ever gets on your nerves, you want to gaze into their eyes and be touching them somewhere...anywhere, as long as you're touching? That feeling does. not. last. I promise you, it will fade, no matter what you do to try to hang on to it. Talk to anyone who has been with the same person for twenty years and they'll tell you the same thing. I think that real love isn't a feeling - I mean, you do have feelings - but it's more than a feeling (to quote Boston =p). It's deeper than an emotion. It's a commitment, it's respect, it's a partnership. Even after those strong "love" feelings fade.

I think anyone who has been in a relationship for even a fifth of the same time could tell you that. You're always most interested in a person who you first meet them. Just because things cool down, doesn't mean you love them any less, though. I completely agree that the way you feel early on isn't really love. It's probably much easier to describe it as lust, as dirty as that sounds.

I don't really want to go into why I was cheated on, either, because no matter which way I look at it, it's offensive to me.

It is true that women tend to be the "emotional" cheaters, and get attached to the person they're doing the deed with. Whereas men tend to just do it out of need to get off.

What bothers me about the unspoken issues in a relationship is that it goes to the extent of cheating.
I realize not everyone is comfortable voicing their wants and feelings, but I don't think it's fair to put the other person in that situation.

I don't believe in the whole "if someone in the relationship cheats there is something wrong with the relationship"--atleast, I don't believe in that entirely.

If someone cheats in the relationship clearly it is their issue, and it's just kind of retarded to put blame on the status of the initial relationship.


In anycase, if my SO cheated on me, I think I would be devistated enough to dump their ass completely and never want to hear from them again.

What the hell, is this 1950? Do you all believe that women don't enjoy sex and men will do anything to get tail? Cuz, um. saying 'so-and-so TEND to do this' doesn't exonerate you, lady. This is hella antiquitated thinking.

I'm so glad you were here to put this more eloquently than I could've hoped to after a day of classes. <3

Somewhere a braless lesbian corpse is rolling in its grave.

More often than not, women don't cheat just for the need of sex.
Believe me, I know that they sometimes do. It just happens that the majority of them are looking for more than just a free fuck.

I have to agree with Lunar Seal on this one, Lurker. How many women do you know who cheat for the sole purpose of having an orgasm? Because we all know that it's rare to find a guy who can give us sexual gratification anyway. It's gotta be for some other reason besides just sex.

Hey, didn't you guys know? Science has proved men and women to be exactly the same. You better pay attention while you're walking around thinking of these ideas or you might accidentally walk off the edge of the Earth!

So in all fairness, what exactly is your situation? You have got us all tied up but now things are more civil and relaxed. Maybe if we knew your situation better we could see your side of the argument better.

Wow. If you people really think that women cheat for SEXUAL FULFILLMENT, you're lying to yourselves.

Am I going to have to bring up the whole gay relationship vs. lesbian relationship thing?

Because yes - men need sex more than women do. It is the natural drive of man to impregnate as many women as possible.

sorry... just noticed - but HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH at sass' sig :)

Come on, you know that's not true.

To quote Kindergarten cop:

"Boys have penises, girls have vaginas!"

While it does depend on the person as an individual... it just happens that statistically (and i hate statistics), women don't cheat for the orgasm.

I dunno... I've known women who have cheated because their boyfriends weren't doing it for them. Is that such a hard thing to believe? :p

What's really lol is that a bunch of women are telling me that men only cheat for orgasms.

I don't know guys, maybe I'm the only one who ever heard of the long-time mistress stereotype.

lol 'men are biologically driven'

That's a nice excuse for guys. I couldn't HELP it, I'm biologically programmed to sleep around.

If that's the case, I'm biologically programmed to mentally destroy you and take everything you own.

Men don't only cheat for orgasms. Just a majority of them do.

I'd cheat on my girlfriend to rip you in two with my raging Kuradoberi. There's something about your brash generalizations that totally turn me on. I'm not too sure if this would be the same case in person. I have a text fetish, so don't be surprised that should we ever meet, I'd tape your mouth shut.

God, I'm all heated right now. Anybody got another pair of blue underoos?

Statistically?

nonono

What you meant to say was that sluts don't cheat for the orgasm, because cheating for the sake of sex is below your adaptation of the ideal woman.

I mean this isn't rocket science, sex for females isn't exactly some painful chore that'd be avoided. Despite your biased viewpoints, a twat has the same nerve endings that release endorphins, relaxants and various other pleasurable chemicals that make having orgasm a pleasurable experience.

Justify it how you like, but you don't get "emotional support" via a dick shoved up yourself.

Do the men in a gay couple have more sex than the women in a lesbian couple because the men are biologically programmed to impregnate as many women as possible?

Like I said before, cribbing your bullshit replies with 'well not all of them do, just most' isn't getting you out of this. If it were true that sex alone is a motivating factor for unfaithfulness, the majority of male indiscretions would be one-night stands. The world would not be gifted with the expression "she doesn't understand me". 'The other woman' would not exist.

It's okay though Lunar. You're allowed to be stupid, because girls don't know any better.

The last I heard statistically women arguably get more pleasure out of sex than men do. I don't know a lot of men that can have multiple orgasms or orgasms sustained for 45 seconds or longer. More like a BAM and I'm spent.

Maybe I just happen to be surrounded by girls that really, really, really enjoy sex to an unusual degree.