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Dec 14, 2007 - 06:53 AM |
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I got told to get eaten by sharks today. |
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I work in a supermarket, again, but this time in the Seafood section. We have this big display of whole fish set in ice, and other shit behind glass. It looks pretty decent, if you're interested in that sort of thing. Now, because the display is open people naturally want to fucking touch everything. This is not allowed! We don't really want people's gross hands all over the fish, so we have a big sign that basically says 'DON'T FUCKING TOUCH'. People ignore it.
So I'm standing there this evening, covering the fish in ice to keep them cold, and this woman comes up and starts looking at the fish. She was a pretty gross old lady, ill fitting clothes, had a moustache. I think she was probably a bit crazy. I bet she had about 50 cats. Anyway, she starts pawing at the fish, prodding them, lifting them up and what not. So in my best and most polite supermarket drone voice I ask her to please not touch the fish. This took about 30 seconds to register in her brain. The conversation following this went something like this!
Old Woman: Are you being rude to me?
Me: No, we just don't allow people to touch the fish.
Old Woman: But I want to see the size, I can't see them without touching them.
Me: That's fine, if you want to look at any let me know, I'll put some gloves on and show you.
Old Woman: No I can do it, I go reef fishing all the time.
Me: Uh... that's fine, but I'm still not going to let you touch them.
Old Woman: I wanted to know if they're gutted or not, they'll be rat shit if they're not.
Me: No they won't, they're fine.
Old Woman: I'd like to see you go reef fishing and see what happens when the sharks get you.
Me: ... Look, do you want anything or not.
Old Woman: No I catch my own fish I don't need any of your shitty fish,
Me: So.. why would you touch them, then?
Old Woman: I was going to wish you a Merry Christmas, but now I won't because you've been rude to me. What's your name, I'm going to see the manager about you.
Me; Okay fine, my name is Chris.
Old Woman: Okay so because you're rude, I'm not saying Merry Christmas.
Then she wandered off, whinging about how our prawns are shit, or something. I don't even know, I turned around and started laughing. Some bloke near by who was listening too was also laughing.
tl;dr version
Crazy old lady is crazy. Wants to see me eaten by sharks.
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to me!