|
Aug 31, 2006 - 01:28 PM |
|
|
My internet Hunt For Funny Stuff, Part 1. |
|
|
Prepare yourselves for some outragously funny stuff within my next posts. Some might be a bit bad though.....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Top Ten Lists Section
----
#1-Top 10 signs that you are obsessing with GoldenEye 007.
10. Whenever you do so much as walk to the post office you duck behind buildings, trash cans, people, and anything else handy while muttering "Damn russkies"
9. You find your old BB Gun and paint it gold.
8. You clamber up into the vent above the toilets at a local McDonalds, and try to shoot a hat off a guy without him noticing.
7. Whenever you play paintball..you try to shoot people in the base of their necks
6. You shoot your friend in the arm playfully and wonder why he collapses so quickly.
5. Sometimes you run into the middle of a highway because you think that 18-wheeler would make for some damn good cover.
4. When you play capture the flag at camp..you bring automatic weapons and mines.
3. You can actually open up Invincibility with time to spare..'nuff said
2. Every time you see a rusty boxcar you look inside..just in case a rogue KGB informant that has info for you decided to hide there.
1. When you go to your local movie store and you see GoldenEye on the shelves you think "Damn..they made a MOVIE out of this?"
---
#2-Top Ten Things You Should Not Do To Celebrate the 1 Year Birthday/Anniversary of the N64
10 - Give your N64 a mud bath to "smooth out those wrinkles".
9 - Change your name legally to Mario Mario
8 - Hunt down the guy in the Crash Bandicoot suit with a rifle
7 - Take your N64 out to dinner
6 - Congatulate Mario through the TV set. He can't hear you. He's not in there. Really.
5 - Throw everything made by Sony you own into a big pile and set it on fire
4 - Feed your N64 a piece of cake
3 - Move to Japan
2 - Send Email to NASA demanding that they name the International Space Station "ISS64"
And the number one thing you should not do to celebrate the 1 year birthday/anniversary of the N64 is: 1 - Surgically implant an N64 controller in your hands.
---
#3-TOP TEN SIGNS YOU'VE BEEN PLAYING TOO MUCH OF STARFOX 64...
10. You nostalgically return to your old SNES games, and feel annoyed at StarFox when a boss blows up and the controller fails to "rumble."
9. You buy a menagerie of certain animals and name them Peppy, Slippy, Falco, Bill and Kat.
8. Your fiancee gives you a silver engagement ring, and you say in your most romantic voice, "Thanks, honey... I was getting a little low on my shield meter."
7. You are teaching your young son the alphabet, and say "A is for firing lasers, B is for bomb, C is for boosting..."
6. You find it strange when the motherships on your Independence Day video don't flip upside-down to destroy buildings.
5. Whenever you see three objects lined up vertically in the distance, you feel an urge to do a somersault.
4. You overhear someone say, "Take that!" and immediately respond "Shut up Slippy!"
3. While playing miniature golf, you hold the putter for a bit before swinging, hoping to get a "homing ball"
2. While watching the Star Wars Special Edition, you routinely wonder why they don't just all do barrel rolls.
1. Somebody's pager goes off and you turn to him and say, "Incoming message from Rob64."
---
#4-TOP TEN SIGNS YOU'VE BEEN PLAYING TOO MUCH OF STARFOX 64...
10. You nostalgically return to your old SNES games, and feel annoyed at StarFox when a boss blows up and the controller fails to "rumble."
9. You buy a menagerie of certain animals and name them Peppy, Slippy, Falco, Bill and Kat.
8. Your fiancee gives you a silver engagement ring, and you say in your most romantic voice, "Thanks, honey... I was getting a little low on my shield meter."
7. You are teaching your young son the alphabet, and say "A is for firing lasers, B is for bomb, C is for boosting..."
6. You find it strange when the motherships on your Independence Day video don't flip upside-down to destroy buildings.
5. Whenever you see three objects lined up vertically in the distance, you feel an urge to do a somersault.
4. You overhear someone say, "Take that!" and immediately respond "Shut up Slippy!"
3. While playing miniature golf, you hold the putter for a bit before swinging, hoping to get a "homing ball"
2. While watching the Star Wars Special Edition, you routinely wonder why they don't just all do barrel rolls.
1. Somebody's pager goes off and you turn to him and say, "Incoming message from Rob64."
---
More later.
|
|
|
|
|