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Jun 14, 2010 - 07:10 AM |
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Meets and such. (Also, student loans.)(Also NIGHTCLUB STORY) |
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Hmmm, I've been reading a lot lately. Particularly about the last meet.
Sounds messy. Not really judging anyone, though it did drive home the point of one point of behavior I need to change for myself in the anticipation of the upcoming GAIF motion capture/meet event.
See, normally, when hanging out with people, I generally don't speak unless I'm spoken to, and if I can't think of anything to add to the conversation, I also say nothing. I'm hoping to change that in time for the upcoming meet, and for when I go back up to Campbellton to hang out with some friends for a bit.
Luckily, when I'm drunk, I'm the most talkative motherfucker you'll ever meet.
That can be a good/bad thing.
Still, reading all this Dramaforce, I've realized that I really should be more open.
Yes, I'm aware that the reclusive-ness of one particular individual wasn't really the main point of complaint, rather, part of a myriad of problems, but the only part I can relate to is the whole keeping-myself-isolated bit.
(I'm not so sure I'll be actually posting in the forums more often on here, though. After all, I'd still like to offer something of relevance in a topic discussion.  )
This actually brings to memory one night that I went out to the Flagship, a nightclub in Campbellton.
See, all my friends had gone away to school, and I was really bummed out about my ex leaving me, so I figured, "what the hell", and went to the Flag by myself.
Normally, I went with my buddy Andrew, who's like, my wingman of sorts. He's actually pretty much the brother I've never had. However, he was away in Borden, studying for aviation engineering. Plus, I was the only one in my group of friends that didn't leave Campbellton to further my education at the time, so I decided to go it alone. I figured, what's the worst that could happen?
Ok, so the worst that could have happened is that I could have gotten drunk, in a fight, then arrested.
Yeah, that would have been bad.
Anyway, I go in, and I see no one I know there. Feeling a little awkward, I go up to the bartender and order a beer.
If you must know, it was an Alexander Keith's. (The mainland doesn't carry Blackhorse, the fuckers. Seriously, you import Newfoundland's Screech rum, but none of the beer? You have Heineken, for fuck's sake. At LEAST bring some Newfoundland beer to the table. ...I want to try it.  )
Anyway, time passes slowly, seemingly contradiction of the fast tempo of the dance music.
I get another drink.
A few more songs pass, and I get another.
After a few more, I have a good buzz going, and actually end up running into a few acquaintances that I knew from my high school years. We chatted a bit, then went our separate ways. Then I start on some Fireball shots and Jagerbombs.
I had money to burn. Unfortunately, my choices in drinks could have been better.
At this point, I'm properly fucked, lost in a shaky haze amidst a wave of pounding trance music, which flowed right through the sea of people on the dance floor. As the floor lights alternated colors and positions, I make a mental note that the people dancing must be drunk too, seeing as how the movement made no sense against the music. Then I realize, "Hey, I can't fucking dance, either. Plus, I'm drunk."
Let me ask you this: Have you ever been shitfaced amongst a sea of people you don't even know, and there's not a familiar face anywhere in the building? It's a weird feeling, isn't it?
I couldn't bring myself to talk to anyone new. I could have made a new friend, at least for the night, anyway.
I wasn't going to try and pick someone up, either. I wasn't interested in one-night stands, and besides, 9 times out of 10, I couldn't successfully hit on someone even if I tried. One time, it did work, though, but I backed out. I realized she was drunk as fuck. More importantly, I realized that I was drunk as fuck.
So there I am, wandering around, drunk and silent. After a while, it felt too weird for me, so I went to the entrance, fumbled the coat check ticket around in my pocket, trying to get it out, retrieved my jacket, and walked home.
Of course, this is generally meaningless. If I had been more open, what would I have gained? Perhaps a Facebook add from people who I would never again talk to. That's the most I can think of, anyway.
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Now to completely change the subject, I'm scrambling like a madman trying to get all my shit together for my student loan application. Especially since I have a disability, I need to get my family doctor in Campbellton to refer me to an audioologist here in Fredericton so I can get that disability sheet filled out. (I have a moderate-to-severe hearing loss.)
I've never applied for a loan before, and this is stressing me out. Thank god my girlfriend is so helpful. 
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So, all that said, looking forward to the GAIF meet. Hopefully I won't be too much of a loner. :P
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