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Jan 5, 2009 - 02:11 AM |
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Hat Travels Through Time! Hatless Owner Furious! |
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Thud left for a cruise in the Caribbean today, but she left a box at my house a few days ago that I was not to open until it was my birthday. Inside I found a time traveling, telepathy-repelling, brain-scanning hard hat, and a CDR of photos and videos illustrating Future Hat's construction and operation.
Since I still haven't meet anyone else worth hanging out with in this town, I spent the night posing in Future Hat, alternating between fantasies of being a time-traveling superhero, and the member of a sci-fi themed hip-hop group.
I guess the first thing I will do with my mini time machine is go back and tell child-me to eat as much as possible, despite being a self-conscious chubby. Sure, you will grow out of it, kid, but the day is going to come when you are living on cans of raw tuna and 4-packs of stale bargain bakery reject bread. You're going to wish you had those extra pounds of fat to burn through come spring '09.
That bizarre encounter in the candy isle of Quick Pak's gas station finally makes sense...
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