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Nov 1, 2008 - 07:28 AM |
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In Which Crash Fucks Around With Ambien and Maybe Fights a Closet at 2:AM |
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I finally acquired some Ambien here. I'm not a heavy user but I do get spells of "hypnagogic jerks" that prevent me from settling into a normal sleep cycle; as my brain senses the slowdown commencing, a sharp, violent muscle twitch in the leg or arm usually, will snap me from my haze, making sleep difficult. This phenonemon isn't uncommon in people who go through large surgeries, then are not allowed to immediately rest. There are also crucial windows at which Ambien cannot be dispensed.
After a week of spending nearly every night with my eyes with open, I got myself the Ambien. Had to climb the doctor's ladder a bit to grab permission but who will stop me?
I took the Ambien with Vicodin, despite my personal concerns that the two have dangerous results. Evidently, this is a myth, or a gross overexagerration of the truth. What it did do was fuck me up in other ways.
After a half hour's of rest, I felt my subconscience flare into a little ball of bright light. The package rapidly spun like a Jiffy-Pop filled with Roman Candles. Somewhere in this, my body was sucked in and I flew around as a firework for a couple seconds. I then awoke, in bed, surrounded by the same eeriliy glowing hospital equipment. It took me several moments to realize I'd been asleep, and to stop believing it was all some hoax. I went to the computer at around midnight and spoke to my brother about it briefly. I then felt faint of mind so went back beneath the sheets.
Shortly after again, I awoke, realized I'd nodded off, then noticed the dinner tray had been removed. I was finally hungry, but where to get food? It should be noted that I'm currently connected to a small network of rubber tubes and cardio monitoring devices, each six times as large as necessary. In my confused stupor, I must have attempted to shut these objects in a closet so that I could freely wander to the cafetera at 2:AM. I had my computer open but most of my time was spent moving around cords and wires. I'd totally disbelieve this segment of the night had there not been a half-empty bag of Doritos and a can of Pepsi on my bedside table right now. Proof that I did somehow make my way over to the corner, grab the snacks, and get busy. But logistically, I never would've tried such a thing so I can only surmise that I'd been sleepwalking.
I awoke twice more, once in bed to the encouragement of a nurse who'd noticed that my blood sugar was dangerously low during a routine check. I guess she got me the orange juice in a glass that I could see.
The second awakening had me in bed again, with the nurse laughing that noe my blood sugar was too high. She chuckled as she threw out my orange juice.
I have little concept of time since then, and have suffered a couple small hallucinations since awakening (temporary effect of the anti-rejection drug), yet I feel as though I could drop right off to sleep at any point now, unhindered. That's what I was looking for.
To think, I could've been getting sleep every night if the nurse practitioner hadn't assumed that my request for a sedative wasn't tantamount to "Gimme narcotics!"? Nice enough woman but she needs to LISTEN.
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